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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #21 (permalink)  
Old 03-28-2014, 03:42 PM
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I don't live in B.C. but you can get the name of the one in Penticton B.C. off the case that I had posted and go from there.
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Old 03-28-2014, 03:50 PM
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My partner gets a lot of attitude and it wears him down. The last being "why are you interrogating us? So you can go after mom?" When all he wanted to do was have idle chit chat about their lives. And one child is all about staying out of it and enjoying their time with him while the other is a mini-gatekeeper and is constantly stopping any talk or fun. It really sucks. But my mom did the same thing to us and in my early 20's i finally wised up and dont have any relationship with her anymore.
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Old 03-28-2014, 03:56 PM
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Yes, and I told the judge about pas bs, then he ordered not to talk negatively in front of the kids.

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Old 03-28-2014, 04:00 PM
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rockscan - sounds as though your own family could have used some serious therapy. Perhaps your family would have been good candidates for the "reintegration" therapy?

In the case I posted, it was mentioned by more than one clinician, that the mother and boyfriend likely didn't know that their actions were alienating. Therefore a form of behavior modification therapy was recommended.

Now it seems that you are continuing on the cycle by having nothing to do with your mother. I am sorry this is happening in your life now. There will come a time someday, perhaps after your mother has died, when you will regret not trying to resolve your issues with her. By not having anything to do with your mother are you not also denying your children the opportunity of spending time with their grandmother?

Alienation seems to be a learned behaviour. Sad to see it passed on from one generation to another.
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Old 03-28-2014, 04:12 PM
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Theres other reasons i dont talk to her but it really bothered me that she manipulated us the way she did. And added to that, my father gave up fighting. I have a great relationship with him now but it doesnt take away from the bulk of my life lost in their battles. Thats the part i stress to my partner. He has to focus on his kids and making sure he is not causing problems.
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Old 03-28-2014, 04:13 PM
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Same in my case, what happened to my ex's father it's happening to me now, so basically my ex's mother is running the show through her daughter, I believe there is an enmeshed relationship between the two, I started to do some research when I noticed that something is not wright with them, long story to explain here, but the problem is that they'll do the same to my kids too...

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Old 03-28-2014, 04:13 PM
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(And i have spent a great deal of time in therapy dealing with issues resulting from their separation.)
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Old 03-28-2014, 04:26 PM
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Yes, alienation it's a learned behavior and it's passed down through generations, like in my case. How to stop it and despite of my warnings OCL still recommended sole custody? The only way I see this to stop is to have equal share time with kids. If the alienating parent gets sole custody pas will not stop.

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Last edited by paco; 03-28-2014 at 04:45 PM.
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Old 03-28-2014, 04:37 PM
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So "Paco" I gather you are Lindsay and now the moderator of this forum?

I don't see your name on the "Introductions" part but maybe I missed it.

Good to know we have another member of the legal world on the forum.
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Old 03-28-2014, 04:47 PM
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No, I'm not Lindsay, I don't know how that text appeared in my reply, it's been corrected. I actually replied to your comment Arabian.

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