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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #11 (permalink)  
Old 09-29-2015, 02:15 PM
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Yeh YD's right. A judge can order it and it can be asked for.
I really wish this would have happened in my case. My lawyer said it's too late now.
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Old 09-29-2015, 03:21 PM
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LF32 I'm not surprised your lawyer told you that because she's an idiot. LOL.

Did she really go to law school?

I don't believe you would seek case management at this time because you have only been in court a few times and both you are your are following the process of case management to Trial. As far as I know (and someone can certainly correct me), case management is typically designated for people who are high-conflict and who are vexatious litigants (take each other to court for emergency motions repeatedly, thus wasting court time etc).

Last edited by arabian; 09-29-2015 at 03:32 PM.
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Old 09-29-2015, 04:25 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by arabian View Post
LF32 I'm not surprised your lawyer told you that because she's an idiot. LOL.

Did she really go to law school?

I don't believe you would seek case management at this time because you have only been in court a few times and both you are your are following the process of case management to Trial. As far as I know (and someone can certainly correct me), case management is typically designated for people who are high-conflict and who are vexatious litigants (take each other to court for emergency motions repeatedly, thus wasting court time etc).
Very good point Arabian.

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Originally Posted by bautista27 View Post
I am just incredulous that OCL would use all her allegations against me. And to not once corroborate with me.
Exact same happened to me. Mine didn't believe fathers should be giving their daughter's baths during their parenting time. lol

I'm holding on to my last breath of hope that there are some "good apples" there. When you get the report take a deep breath before reading it. My guess is it will be shocking as hell to you....from what you've said.

You have to realize that judges are super smart...they can see a ridiculous OCL report a mile away...and yes they will throw it out.

But as I've said before...you may be able to use it. False allegations, credibility and bad faith are great for trial. As crazy as mine was ... I may just keep it for trial. The things OCL and ex said were just too outlandish....contradicting many of her other statements.
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Old 09-29-2015, 04:47 PM
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That's great stuff, LF32.

I wrongly assumed that an OCL rep was there to evaluate each parent's capability to parent. But it seems like she spent more time on what a bad guy I supposedly am.
You would think it's a red flag when one party spends the majority of her time spewing about her ex?

Let me ask a question...if your ex got pregnant while we've been separated (not divorced!) by some random dude off the internet (not a bf), shouldn't that be relevant to her parenting decision-making capabilities? Nevermind the incredible lack of morals and high risk-taking!!
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Old 09-29-2015, 07:13 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bautista27 View Post
Let me ask a question...if your ex got pregnant while we've been separated (not divorced!) by some random dude off the internet (not a bf), shouldn't that be relevant to her parenting decision-making capabilities? Nevermind the incredible lack of morals and high risk-taking!!
People make lots of mistakes when newly separated. As long as there is no safety risk to your child, what she does with other men on her time is none of your business.
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Old 09-29-2015, 08:48 PM
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People make lots of mistakes when newly separated. As long as there is no safety risk to your child, what she does with other men on her time is none of your business.
Unless it's a man who finds a new woman. Then S&T makes it her business ...saying it's too soon, etc.
Just read my threads and you'll see what I mean.

Last edited by LovingFather32; 09-29-2015 at 08:51 PM.
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Old 09-29-2015, 09:11 PM
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Originally Posted by LovingFather32 View Post
Unless it's a man who finds a new woman. Then S&T makes it her business ...saying it's too soon, etc.
Just read my threads and you'll see what I mean.
Omg, I laughed out loud.

Touche LF. Touche!
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Old 09-29-2015, 10:21 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SadAndTired View Post
People make lots of mistakes when newly separated. As long as there is no safety risk to your child, what she does with other men on her time is none of your business.
A one-off incident is never proof of anything by itself with the exception of when a man hits a woman. In that case alone it is justification for anything a judge wants to do. However, if her home was a rotating door of boyfriends and some other factors then it would be a consideration.
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Old 09-30-2015, 12:26 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bautista27 View Post
Let me ask a question...if your ex got pregnant while we've been separated (not divorced!) by some random dude off the internet (not a bf), shouldn't that be relevant to her parenting decision-making capabilities? Nevermind the incredible lack of morals and high risk-taking!!
No. Not unless there's evidence that her pregnancy is jeopardizing the child. She may be an excellent parent who is having another baby. I really hope you didn't treat the OCL to your views on Mom's "incredible lack of morals!".
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Old 09-30-2015, 09:44 AM
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I realize its her business who sleeps with. She's had many partners, men and women, since our separation and I really don't care.

I am concerned about the men she brings into the home, as I have no clue who they are and if my child is exposed.

The OCL mentioned I should do background checks on the men if I was concerned. What are the chances my ex would be truthful with who she brought into her apartment?

And for the record, according to my ex, this was an accidental pregnancy, and the random dude was totally opposed to having the baby, but she was trying to get him to have it. A concerned parent might get worried about the possibility of violence in this scenario! What if my daughter becomes a collateral to the violence?
It seems that Stripes and SadandTired is advocating sitting on my hands and doing nothing.
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