Long Weekend Access

[standing on the sidelines]

all I asked was if the child actually wanted to do the activity. I am sure that for NCP and CP it is hard to work out childrens activities so that everyone is happy.

[billm]

Originally Posted by independentgal

... It is not in their child's best interests to spend less time with the NCP regardless of the activities the NCP might plan...

And what if doing the activity was in their best interests anyway? Do I (yes that bad word "I"), not deserve time with my own kids? Not everything can be simply boiled down to 'the best interest of the child' even though the courts love that phrase (it seems), and people here are afraid to justify their actions any other way.

I have rights as a father, a parent, a person, just as my kids have rights and though generally the role is 'parent gives to child' (I would give my life for my children), if I ran my life with every decision based on 'in the best interests of the child' (which sometimes I feel I do run my life that way!), I would be selling myself short. I don't want my kids to grow up and have kids and do that, and I don't expect it of myself. I consider my children and myself part of a family, and mostly the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the one, but not always!

[time2lookahead]

Originally Posted by billm

And what if doing the activity was in their best interests anyway? Do I (yes that bad word "I"), not deserve time with my own kids? Not everything can be simply boiled down to 'the best interest of the child' even though the courts love that phrase (it seems), and people here are afraid to justify their actions any other way.

I have rights as a father, a parent, a person, just as my kids have rights and though generally the role is 'parent gives to child' (I would give my life for my children), if I ran my life with every decision based on 'in the best interests of the child' (which sometimes I feel I do run my life that way!), I would be selling myself short. I don't want my kids to grow up and have kids and do that, and I don't expect it of myself. I consider my children and myself part of a family, and mostly the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the one, but not always!

Billm your wisdom is appreciated. For that exact reason is why we chose to cancel the family wedding this w/e it was not best for us as a whole.
My partner does have rights as a father! And the way his ex keeps setting up these activities during our access time ends up disappointing the ONE child...there is a younger one who broke down the last time they were here saying how unfair it is that X always gets what s/he wants and s/he just gets dragged along.

One more point of interst in this whole mess, the youngest told us that s/he was asked if s/he wanted to visit dad this w/e or just "stay home with x and mommy."

Thank you once again Billm, I have said it before and I will say it again...you are a wise man.