Ottawa Divorce .com Forums


User CP

New posts

Advertising

  Ottawa Divorce .com Forums > Main Category > Divorce & Family Law

Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

Closed Thread
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
  #1 (permalink)  
Old 05-05-2009, 11:35 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 55
time2lookahead is on a distinguished road
Default Long Weekend Access

I could give you the long version or the short version here so I am going for medium sized.

My b/f has his children on this coming long weekend. He reminded the ex that it was a long weekend and he would be having the kids until the Monday. The court order contains no specifics as to whether or not he keeps them the extra day over the weekend. His lawyer said it was assumed that he would get them for that day but she seems to be saying otherwise.

Does anyone know something more concrete IRT this?
  #2 (permalink)  
Old 05-06-2009, 07:38 AM
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Kitchener Ontario
Posts: 5,241
standing on the sidelines is on a distinguished road
Default

what does the court order say. If it says he gets them from say Friday to Sunday then that is the specific days that he gets them no matter if it is a long weekend or not. That is his access time and she can argue that. Remember that in law nothing can be assumed, it has to be clear and concise. Long weekend visitation etc should have been put in the original court order. She is probably wanting to follow it to the letter so that it remains the same. Once the parties start to change things without changing the court order, it seems to end up one big mess.

That being said, IMHO the Cp should allow the NCP to have the extra day on the long weekends or at least a few of the long weekends.
  #3 (permalink)  
Old 05-06-2009, 10:26 AM
billm's Avatar
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 2,430
billm is on a distinguished road
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by standing on the sidelines View Post
...
That being said, IMHO the Cp should allow the NCP to have the extra day on the long weekends or at least a few of the long weekends.

I couldn't agree more. She needs to relax and be reasonable. Following the court order to the exact wording is for unreasonable people, there are always exceptions that reasonably should be allowed. Of course weekend access includes long weekends, she is being selfish and difficult with no benifit to anyone.
  #4 (permalink)  
Old 05-06-2009, 01:01 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 55
time2lookahead is on a distinguished road
Default

In this, like so many other cases that reach this stage, being reasonable no longer applies. She is scheduling all day events during his access time, cutting phone calls short, etc. I could go on, but most here know how these things go.

This is an interim order, and a return to court seems inevitable. She is angry about this, and doing all she can to cause grief.

In my own case, we specifically asked the lawyer about this when the order was being drawn up, and he said 'it goes without saying that if it is a long week-end...'. I have followed this, and allowed my ex to keep our children for the extra day, but my bf's ex is making demands before allowing the same courtesy. I was hoping there was some case law, etc surrounding this issue.
  #5 (permalink)  
Old 05-06-2009, 02:02 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 55
time2lookahead is on a distinguished road
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by billm View Post
I couldn't agree more. She needs to relax and be reasonable. Following the court order to the exact wording is for unreasonable people, there are always exceptions that reasonably should be allowed. Of course weekend access includes long weekends, she is being selfish and difficult with no benifit to anyone.
LOL at 'she needs to relax'

Reasonable people relax and give things thought.
  #6 (permalink)  
Old 05-06-2009, 03:38 PM
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Ontario
Posts: 140
kamkatie is on a distinguished road
Default

CanLII - 1994 CanLII 4972 (SK Q.B.)

CanLII - 2002 ABQB 1096 (CanLII)

CanLII - 1996 CanLII 6698 (SK Q.B.)

CanLII - 2008 SKQB 397 (CanLII)

CanLII - 1999 ABQB 221 (CanLII)

CanLII - 2005 BCSC 576 (CanLII)

CanLII - 2001 MBQB 250 (CanLII)

CanLII - 2008 ONCJ 672 (CanLII)

The courts have consistently ruled that an access weekend includes the extra day for the long weekend. Again, one of those things that's obvious to reasonable people but unfortunately not so obvious to others. Good luck!
  #7 (permalink)  
Old 05-06-2009, 03:45 PM
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Toronto
Posts: 885
#1StepMom is on a distinguished road
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by time2lookahead View Post
LOL at 'she needs to relax.' Reasonable people relax and give things thought.
So very true. Unreasonable people (such as those thanks to whom many of us are here seeking advice) are those that make huge deals of every little thing and who cause more problems than not.

Time2lookahead, it is reasonable to expect that an access weekend includes the 24 or 48 hours of a long weekend. Unless there is a specific order against that, I would not think a judge would go against your boyfriend if he kept his child(ren) for the extra day.
  #8 (permalink)  
Old 05-06-2009, 04:08 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 55
time2lookahead is on a distinguished road
Default

Thank you all so very much. I cannot begin to describe the totally unreasonable issues the ex in this matter has and the only only ones who are hurting over it all are his and her beautiful children.

I hope to see a light soon at the end of this tunnel but it doesn't look like it will be anytime soon.

As far as reasonable goes....she is not...last year..she denied him access on Father's Day.
  #9 (permalink)  
Old 05-06-2009, 09:43 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 61
doingmybest is on a distinguished road
Default

You should think about seeking a variance on the court order to have these things specifically defined...if she is being unreasonable. Then they are defined and there is no question...avoid conflict down the line. Just a suggestion. Good luck...
  #10 (permalink)  
Old 05-06-2009, 10:12 PM
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 26
ResponsibleMom is on a distinguished road
Default

In most interim or general settlement orders, the language used in reference to long weekends usually refers to weekends and holidays. Holidays are usually split equally between the parents on a even/odd year switch.
As a custodial parent,I would prefer that the pick-up time on long weekends is bumped up an hour so my daughter can smoothly settle back into the routine as it's on a school night. Unfortunatly, my divorce was extremely difficult and I decided to forego arguing over the small stuff
Her own lawyer will tell her the court will not back her on this issue.
Why not suggest having the kids back on the holiday Monday at 4 or 5 p.m. in order to facilitate a smoother school night routine?
If she turns that down and you do go to court over it, you will appear to be considerate with the kids best interests in mind. If she accepts this point, it may set a precedent with your negotiations.
My daughter has an extremely tough time settling in after an access weekend. Unlike many other hands on parents who co-parent, her father still hasn't quite got the hang of it. Divorce is difficult for kids as it is without adding the difficulty of transferring from one house to another . Kids who come home after a weekend away, have to finish homework,have showers,get their stuff together for school and decompress. Having enough time on Sunday or Monday is really important for them. As they get older and more independent, the access schedule can change and become more flexible.
The best of luck, let us know how it works out.
Closed Thread


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Have I given up my rights as a parent? brokendad Common Law Issues 3 11-05-2009 07:57 PM
Can I ask to vary an access order based on indifferent father? independentgal Parenting Issues 1 03-05-2009 07:52 AM
Help me interpret access as ordered by judge independentgal Parenting Issues 1 12-14-2008 12:58 PM
Access Weekend MTLMOM Divorce & Family Law 1 02-14-2007 02:11 AM
Case Conference Info tycooke Divorce & Family Law 9 07-12-2006 10:11 AM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 01:08 AM.