how did you pay for your lawyer?

[mgchoosey]

I'm just wondering how any of you have payed for your lawyer if
you are short of cash.
In my case I'm just getting back to working fulltime-it will likely take a year as I am freelance.
However I do have half the house as equity.Im wondering if I could use it
as "lien" towards legal fees?

Are there any other ways.Seems I dont qualify for legal aid.I had a consultation with them and found that out.

thanks

[epinecone]

I cashed in most of my retirement savings.. stopped buying clothing and extras for me... and used every dollar I could afford after the kids were taken care of.. My Lawyer and hers have wiped out all of my liquidity, all of my savings, and enough money so far that all three of my kids could have gone to University without ever worrying about student loans.

[mgchoosey]

epinecone- did you get joint custody in the end?

I dont think my wife realizes yet but we too will both be wiped out if
we go this route.

i may have to tho - otherwise she may take him back to her country of origin indefinitly.

I may be wrong. but if she got sole custody she might be able to that.

[epinecone]

I did get Equal Shared Parenting / Joint Custody.. But She left the kids with me when she left.. I have a friend going through a divorce, who has been out of the house for 6 months, with his former spouse keeping the kids and now a judge has told him it would be disruptive to move to Joint Custody..

[mgchoosey]

Originally Posted by epinecone

I did get Equal Shared Parenting / Joint Custody.. But She left the kids with me when she left.. I have a friend going through a divorce, who has been out of the house for 6 months, with his former spouse keeping the kids and now a judge has told him it would be disruptive to move to Joint Custody..

thanks alot..
ive heard of that: when a spouse moves out from the family home the parent with the kids gets 'defacto' custody(usually the mother tho)...
and it is harder to trun that around

thats why im still living with spouse & trying to get her to understand
the importance of joint custody. Not to mention I was the one at home
with him for the last 8 yrs.

m

[epinecone]

I wish you luck.. The best thing for a child is to see both parents as much as possible. Tell your spouse to forget about money and all the other junk involved in divorce and think about the next 10 years of your childs life.. A child should have both parents in their life as much as possible.

[dinkyface]

A lien is just an IOU note secured against your home equity. Probably a lawyer would require actual $$, not an IOU.

Sell assets, remortgage, borrow...

[billm]

Originally Posted by epinecone

...I have a friend going through a divorce, who has been out of the house for 6 months, with his former spouse keeping the kids and now a judge has told him it would be disruptive to move to Joint Custody..

Separating the children from the father was the original disruption and a much more serious one, so the logic here is to continue that disruption for the rest of the childrens childhood!! - what is wrong with Judges and parents that intentionally keep the other parent from raising their own children - disgusting!

[today]

Credit card cheques, line of credit, loans from anyone who dared, still paying...... once the sale of home any equity to help pay off whatever possible towards the accumulated debt, with a home re mortgaged to the max.

All that just to gain an equal shared parenting role/involvement with my children. Would have been so much less expensive to just give in and pay support, but not good for the children.

I don't regret it one bit, it is worth it to have happy well adjusted children, worth every penny but a shame the law permits this.

[dadtotheend]

Handsomely!