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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #11 (permalink)  
Old 02-17-2010, 11:13 PM
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I gave a quick glance to the replies to your post so just ignore if i am over lapping any information.
My great ex wanted the same and he bugged the Judge so much that he ordered the OCL invovement.We had high conflicts,CAs was called twice on me,Absolutely on non talking terms etc etc.Guess what after 8 weeks of wait OCL refused to take the case.But when I asked my lawyer what if OCL gets invoved.She gave me mixed views.As per her it depends 75% on the worker who will be taking the case.
In certain cases she had experienced the unforseen results with the OCL involvement and My lawyer was almost sure that OCL will take my case.

My ex claimed that I have post partum depression.Whenever the kids are sick I hang them upsidedown in the washroom and hit them.His accusation gave me tears nothing else.But then when he told the same things to CAS worker she questioned him --THEN WHY DID YOU LEAVE THE HOME WITHOUT YOUR KIDS?YOUR KIDS ARE SURE IN DANGER WITH SUCH A MOTHER?To this he fipped and told the worker -THATS WHY HE HAD THEM(CAS) INVOLVED

Last edited by sufferer; 02-17-2010 at 11:23 PM.
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Old 02-17-2010, 11:25 PM
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that's he thing, he hasn't even responded to my application and has said all along he wants 50/50. I am all for the eqaully split time, but not happy with jint custody as he has already caused problems. He has never said he would go for sole custody (well, maybe when he was angry). I can't see why he would want this. If they were going to lean any way other than joint they would lean towards me.
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Old 02-17-2010, 11:34 PM
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I might be wrong but my understandng is that shared custody is joint by default.Don't worry if thats the status quo its unlikely that the Judge will even order OCL involvement.Even if he ordersit chances are minimal that they wil take yur case.
Take a chill pill .;-)
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Old 02-17-2010, 11:36 PM
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thanks. I'm not worried though. I could use some chill time though!
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Old 02-17-2010, 11:41 PM
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I had OCL involved in my case. It was the other parties request. I did not want the intrusion but in the end the report was in my favour, it was exactly what I was offering....BUT THE JUDGE DID NOT EVEN LOOK AT IT AND MADE A JUDGEMENT CONTRARY TO THE REPORT. Needless to say I am flabbergasted!
Two months of interrogation for nothing!
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Old 02-18-2010, 12:17 AM
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Billie - The intake form is available online if you want to take a look at it.

Ministry of the Attorney General - Intake Form for Custody/Access

The judge does have to order it. I didn't waste my money with having my lawyer help me fill it out.

Its hit and miss with any court documents, sometimes judges read it, sometimes not. My lawyer always gives me the *lowdown* on the judge, and gives her opinion on whether or not the judge will have read the documents provided. Both female judges have read the documents in my case - Thank goodness.

FWIW - All exs medical documents were ordered to be released to me due to child safety so don't be surprised if your ex goes down that path but you could always request the same.
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Old 02-18-2010, 10:27 AM
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If he requested medical documentation I have nothing to hide. I have been seeing counsellors, but I have already recieved glowing reviews and letters from them stating that I am coping very well with the situation and doing everything I can to help my daughter.

If this does happen I will be requesting his medical documents. He was seeing a Pschychiatrist and I don't know if he was ever dignosed. I suspect he either is bipolar or may have borderline-personality disorder. Regardless, it would prove that he indeed does have clinical depression , as he claims that he was never depressed. If he goes down this road then he is taking a big chance. I really don't get why his lawyer would tell him it was a good idea???
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Old 02-18-2010, 10:33 AM
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If you are getting close to what you want in terms of custody, access and support, and are not concerned that the child would be in danger, then there is no reason to get the OCL involved. You simply draft an agreement and have him and his lawyer sign it or propose ammendments. If they propose unreasonable changes or won't sign but have no valid reason, then you make a motion for what you want in court. If what you want is based on a status quo that he has accepted and if he has no grounds for opposing it, then you should get what you want and he will be ordered to pay court costs.

My wife had the OCL involved twice and the investigator was very professional, and this is what eventually led her ex to agree to joint-shared custody. He had accused my wife of being mentally unstable, but after two psychiatric evaluations, two OCL investigations and a bunch of illegal and immoral tactics on his part, he ran out of room to keep opposing it.

We are now dealing with FRO and trying to get them to fix the mess they made of this case since my wife changed from being the payor to the payee.
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Old 02-18-2010, 11:12 AM
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Grover, I have already sent him 2 offers that were very reasonable and pretty much status Quo. I filed for custody and had an emergency motion where an order was made for joint custody with 50/50 time and gave me the responsibility for health, counselling and ordered him to give consent.

He has no reason to even proceed with the court because he is not going to get anything more that 50/50 and joint custody (which is what we have) Getting the OCL involved is a waste of time and taxpayers money, and it will only end up either recommending SQ or something more in my favour.

I only have some small concerns that he may end up emotionally abusing her like he did to me. But I don't think it will happen ( he realized what he was doing to me and has not treated her that way, to my knowledge). Yes, it's possible, but if it is going to happen it will, regardless of how much time she is with him. That possiblity will not do anything to change the situation. I don't feel that having the OCL involved will be of any benefit to him and not likely to benefit me.

I am reluctant to go to court to have FRO involved as well. This year I am paying the offset amount, but his wage has increased and it is likely that he will have to pay me next year. I don't want them involved since there is good chance that our wages will change again and I know how hard it is to make changes with them. Just not worth the hassle.
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Old 02-18-2010, 11:53 AM
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If you are happy with the status quo, then just reply that you disagree with his opinion on getting the OCL involved and suggest that he sign the proposed settlement. If he refuses to sign, then the status quo will work for now. If he wants to go to court to ask for OCL involvement, just come with a good argument that while you are not opposed, you don't think it is necessary. He will likely be ordered to pay costs for bringing the case to court when it was not necessary, or you could choose to file a cross motion to implement your latest offer, based on his lack of any substantial response.
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