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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #31 (permalink)  
Old 12-16-2016, 11:36 PM
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Don't go overboard with asking for access. You don't want to seem obsessive. Ask for special occasions etc... that's it.

You need to go to trial in May.

You argue that the LEGAL status quo is 50/50 and if the judge tries to render a decision based on the current non-prejudicial status quo you must contest and then appeal. You can only accept a transition to resettle the kids in your care but nothing less.

Then you go through the motions of "Best interests of kids"....
She doesn't facilitate access for no good reason.
You were involved dad
Kids benefit blah blah

I don't believe in negotiating with people who want sole custody and anything more than 50% equalization. Take them to court, beat them and move on.
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  #32 (permalink)  
Old 12-18-2016, 03:31 PM
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Quote:
Don't go overboard with asking for access. You don't want to seem obsessive. Ask for special occasions etc... that's it.
I disagree. You "are obsessive" about seeing your child .. any parent would be. I sent out 2 per week and made a nice, color coded monthly access denial chart that the judge really appreciated. The more the judge sees denials, the worse she looks. Of course you dont go crazy psycho with 14 e-mails a day. Common sense stuff .....but your ex is praying you dont ask for these things a lot in writing...so do it.

Mr.Toronto and a few others helped e formulate what we called "blitz e-mails" twice per week. Asking to exchange parenting plans, separation agreements, graduated access schedules, www.ourfamilywizard.com for improved communication, requests for mediation and/or family counseling, etc.

The reason? To show the judge a) You Want To See Your Kids ; b)You want to stay OUT of court ; c) You're resolution focused and very reasonable.

I think Links is confusing "negotiating" with setting up some nice exhibits for court. We already know she'll say no to everything....you're just collecting her unreasonable denials so you have ore than "he said/she said" for the judge.

Last edited by LovingFather32; 12-18-2016 at 03:35 PM.
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  #33 (permalink)  
Old 12-19-2016, 12:40 PM
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Mr.Toronto ...
Whatever happened to that poster. Dropped off the face of the planet.
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  #34 (permalink)  
Old 12-19-2016, 01:07 PM
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Whatever happened to that poster. Dropped off the face of the planet.
Very good question.
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  #35 (permalink)  
Old 12-23-2016, 06:45 PM
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Facing a new dilemma...

While I was negotiating a payment plan with FRO for my CS arrears, my STBX called them to get paid ASAP and I got a letter from FRO stating that my salary will be garnished at 50%. I cannot meet my months on only 50% of my revenu. The worst is that she knew from my last affidavit that I was in a poor financial situation and she presently have a net disposable income of 2K more than me. What a pain! I must fight that in Court but the problem is, being on the trial list, I need a permission to request a motion.
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  #36 (permalink)  
Old 12-23-2016, 06:52 PM
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I must also point out that the arrears are due to the time I lost access to my home and kids and didn't agree on the parenting schedule she was forcing me to accept. By law, I have no choice but to pay those arrears. I was already paying CS with FRO and never mist a payment... why the hell are they forcing garnishments even though I was a good payer? FRO really makes the payers (mostly the men) look like we are assholes. The intentions is to cause more stress to the payers and to make their life miserable.
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  #37 (permalink)  
Old 12-23-2016, 07:30 PM
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I was at 0% of my revenue for a year, at 50% for like 2 years straight... they don't give a crap. Just put it on credit cards and then go bankrupt at the end.... I'm rich and debt free now
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  #38 (permalink)  
Old 12-23-2016, 07:45 PM
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I know for a lot of people bankruptcy is an easy way out... or I should say it is the ONLY way... sadly. For me, it is not an option as I already bought my new house. I prefer making the best I can until the system makes me go homeless. I don't like the cold so I will need to move South.

They cannot garnish more than 50% of your revenu. How did you survive on 0%? Were you homeless during that period?

I would say I am also at 0% since she has the house, the children and all my money. Next, she will go after my life as there is nothing left to steel from me.

Last edited by mafia007; 12-23-2016 at 07:49 PM.
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  #39 (permalink)  
Old 12-23-2016, 08:35 PM
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Lying by omission seems to be the strategy for many who have to pay support.

Standard of living often reveals someone's true income.

If you feel the current order for support is inappropriate you have the option of going to court and having the amount adjusted. Maintenance enforcement agencies can only alter the amount you pay if they feel you are suffering undue hardship. Good luck convincing them though... they're not stupid and require corroborating information. If you are an honest debtor you should be okay though.
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  #40 (permalink)  
Old 12-23-2016, 09:44 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Links17 View Post
I was at 0% of my revenue for a year, at 50% for like 2 years straight... they don't give a crap. Just put it on credit cards and then go bankrupt at the end.... I'm rich and debt free now
Not a good idea if you own a home. If you don't own a home, want bad credit for the next 7 years, and want to screw the government right back, then yes, excellent idea.

Best bet, stay up to date with Child Support no matter what, get a low interest credit line and give them everything you owe and pay your credit line company couple hundred dollars a month, and maybe put it on your mortgage. I would say that would be cheaper than trying to fight FRO while dealing with access issues. It won't be worth the headache.

Last edited by trinton; 12-23-2016 at 09:51 PM.
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