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NBDad 09-20-2010 02:52 PM

Hammerdad makes an awesome suggestion on how to gather proof of denial of access. You also need to be more assertive with your lawyer.

Sending letters back and forth does nothing more than cost you money.

ONE letter...ONE...with a response required by date within 48 hours. If that fails, then direct him to get a motion before the court for contempt due to denial of access. and ask for make up time. Also ask for costs due to having to go to court from her unreasonableness. (You won't get what you don't ask for, and while you MAY not get it the first time, if it continues to happen, then eventually you will draw a judge who will get annoyed and essentially bitch slap your ex)

Think of letters like $100 bills...for every one you allow your lawyer to send, you are basically handing him one. Unless you are firm and clear in your expectations, your lawyer will gladly string things along for you. You = $$$, the longer he draws it out, the more $$$ he makes.

Also, the longer you wait, the longer you are allowing your ex to set "status quo". You don't ASK your ex to be a parent, you INFORM her that you are exercising YOUR COURT ORDERED time with the kids.

Fedupandtired 09-20-2010 03:13 PM

Thank you so much for the information. I will no longer ask. Family court is so backed up here I'm not sure if it's my lawyers fault? She said there was a case conference in Oct and she would be mailing me the info..I haven't received it yet.

Pharah 09-20-2010 03:14 PM

You have joint custody so go to their school/daycare and take them for lunch. Make sure your kids know that you haven't abandoned them.

Make sure you are calling their dentist and doctor to follow-up on their progress.

If the lawyer is not doing what you want, can him and do it yourself. Visit the FLIC office and get a case conference date set!

billiechic 09-20-2010 04:50 PM

Do ALL of those things! Take your court order with you when you go to take the kids out for lunch though, and stop in and see the principal to show it to him/her first.

InterprovincialParents 09-20-2010 04:53 PM


Originally Posted by billiechic (Post 48313)
Do ALL of those things! Take your court order with you when you go to take the kids out for lunch though, and stop in and see the principal to show it to him/her first.

Actually, if it has not already been done, make a copy of it for each child and meet with the principal to ensure it is placed in your children's school records...The school is mandated by law to prevent anyone from taking the kids or even discussing the kids without a court order that outlines custodial/access right.

As the children enter new schools, ensure the court order is there...if it is not, you would have to fight with the schools for any access to information. You can also meet with the teacher, and ensure s/he is aware of the current situation, as school professionals can help the children through any issues they may be having as a result of your ex's unreasonableness.

Fedupandtired 09-20-2010 06:09 PM

You have no idea how much I appreciate all this advice. Thank you so much.

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