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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #1 (permalink)  
Old 10-27-2016, 12:59 PM
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Default Delay tactics - do they work?

Submitted an application to the court claiming support for 3 kids, custody decision, equalization and disposition of the marital home. STBX's lawyer refused service on his behalf, so he was served via a process server on Sept. 29. A few days later, his lawyer dumped him. A few days after that, he found a new lawyer. So his response is due to be submitted within a few days, and we have a case conference scheduled for December. Lo and behold, his new lawyer is asking for an extension to submit a response. Issues are not complicated.
My question is, when it comes time to appear in front of a judge, are these delays seen as the tactic they are? He is on lawyer #3 and has yet to sign anything (parenting agreement) submit sworn financials or cooperate in any way. I have sent 2 reasonable offers to settle, which he has rejected. His counter offers were ridiculous, and he even admitted they were BS (I have texts which show this).
Are these delay tactics a normal annoyance that I have to get used to and tolerate? And pay for? Surely the process server and back and forth between my lawyer and his new lawyer are going to cost me at least a couple hundred bucks on top of everything else.
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Old 10-27-2016, 01:12 PM
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Yes delay tactics do work. Will you have to pay for them? Yes again. A couple of hundred dollars extra? Count yourself lucky. Try thousands, tens of thousands or even hundreds of thousands spent due to delay tactics. Will he get away with it ? Yes again. The only time he may have to pay anything is at trial , if your case goes that far. Even then he'll only have to pay 75% of your costs.

Is family court unfair? No it's not. Why you ask? ...because it's unfair to BOTH parties which ultimately makes it fair.
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Old 10-27-2016, 01:22 PM
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Self-Respreseting
0$ cost to me
Shared Custody Granted
Alimony Ended

Ex-Wife
90,000$ legal fees (i paid part via SS). 60,000$ still owing maybe
Lost sole custody
No more alimony

Lawyers 0 - Judges 0 - Ex-spouses 0 - Me -1

All because I took the time to self-represent.
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Old 10-27-2016, 02:09 PM
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Oh I'm way into it - it's a couple hundred this month, thousands over the last 18 months.
Links, I work full time and kids live with me. As much as I would love to self represent, it's not possible right now.
And, this was supposed to be amicable. Once STBX saw the table amount for CS he started these shenanigans. I was fine paying a lawyer a few grand for an amicable separation agreement.
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Old 10-27-2016, 02:23 PM
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Can't you just start with application for an interim order for basic child support, and an order for him to produce financials, and the judge should at least impute an income to start the child support ball rolling at least, if your eligible for the child support.
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Old 10-27-2016, 05:22 PM
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I work full-time and kids lived with me

Lawyers have played the FUD card and you fell for it..
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Old 10-27-2016, 05:57 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Links17 View Post
I work full-time and kids lived with me

Lawyers have played the FUD card and you fell for it..
will you please stop with this. Not everyone is cut out to self rep. It doesn't make them wrong in fact I think they are smart to recognize their limitations due to time or whatever.
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Old 10-27-2016, 06:27 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Links17 View Post
Self-Respreseting
0$ cost to me
Shared Custody Granted
Alimony Ended

Ex-Wife
90,000$ legal fees (i paid part via SS). 60,000$ still owing maybe
Lost sole custody
No more alimony

Lawyers 0 - Judges 0 - Ex-spouses 0 - Me -1

All because I took the time to self-represent.
Links often leaves out:

1) Initial catastrophic losses
2) Declaration that he was a vexatious litigant
3) Appeals

The average person would be crushed by such calamitous events. Hell, I would be crushed by such events, and I'm a rather intelligent individual.

I find on this forum we actually push too much at both ends. We tell too many people "get a lawyer"... but many people cannot afford a lawyer. We tell too many people "self-rep", but many people do not have the appropriate character to self-rep.
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Old 10-27-2016, 07:21 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Janus View Post
Links often leaves out:
I find on this forum we actually push too much at both ends. We tell too many people "get a lawyer"... but many people cannot afford a lawyer. We tell too many people "self-rep", but many people do not have the appropriate character to self-rep.
and some of us can't write affidavits or factotums, or just say too much or disclose too much and maybe incriminate ourselves without realizing it.

As per the posters initial question, his counsel needs time to get up to speed and it is reasonable for new counsel to push back dates to get up to speed with everything, etc.

delay tactics do work. creates costs to all parties, stress, anxiety, and it all ultimately comes down onto the child. Try over 10 months worth of delays. Our courts are also backlogged. Don't expect a resolution tomorrow.

Here is the thing with courts - you rush to get there, but once you're there, you feel like you're stuck in quicksand
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Old 10-27-2016, 08:52 PM
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Delays for financial matters are generally irrelevant - the decisions can easily be retroactive to the day the motion was filed and for child support 3yrs prior unless you are worried the person is throwing away assets (then you file an emergency motion).

It's a free country, I can say what I want.

My goal is to destabilize the family court system so that it stops becoming the family shakedown system it is.

One of the ways is by having self-represented litigants flood the system - refusing to destroy their futures by paying outrageous legal fees .

People overestimate what is required to self-represent - sure I am an exceptional litigant but for the majority of matters its very simple.

Child support is public order which means that in almost any condition the judge has to do what's right for the child or even unfair if it benefits the child.

I make mistakes too but the system is way more forgiving.

All you pretty much do is COPY-PASTE from existing case-law.

"Hey Judge, look at this judgement - now you have to do what happened here"

The amount people will lose by self-representing is LESS than they lose by paying lawyers unless they are very rich.

Instead of sitting on your fat asses watching Americal Idol, research shit - prep your arguments and pay lawyers 100$ fees to review a document.

Judges and lawyers have 0 math literacy and its critically important for family law but they get away with it.

p.s: my initial catastrophic event was unavoidable because of the way quebec law is. One of the terribly unfair things that only exist as a "loophole"

Last edited by Links17; 10-27-2016 at 08:56 PM.
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