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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #41 (permalink)  
Old 06-29-2017, 03:44 PM
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Originally Posted by arabian View Post
he probably got a better deal on a home that happened to be closer to the kid's school.

he probablyfigured that as long as he has to take the kids sometimes he would save money on gas by moving closer to the kid's school

he probably moved closer to the kid's schools just to annoy the mother.

and so on.......

I can "speculate" just as well as you can.... L O L
Speculation..... is most of what this site is. I agree. I'll never say im right.....but that doesn't mean I'm wrong. Lol

So many posters twist facts to get what they want to hear. In this case I've pointed out so many darn inconsistencies in her story.. I'm just shocked that others refuse to see it.....or don't want to see them. They want to imagine this money hungry dad who doesn't really want to see his kids....all.money. Based on her facts ... I see something MUCH different.
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  #42 (permalink)  
Old 06-29-2017, 03:57 PM
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Originally Posted by LovingFather32 View Post
Speculation..... is most of what this site is. I agree. I'll never say im right.....but that doesn't mean I'm wrong. Lol

So many posters twist facts to get what they want to hear. In this case I've pointed out so many darn inconsistencies in her story.. I'm just shocked that others refuse to see it.....or don't want to see them. They want to imagine this money hungry dad who doesn't really want to see his kids....all.money. Based on her facts ... I see something MUCH different.


Considering that my partner was seen as a money grubbing deadbeat in the beginning I would be a chief player in the camp of "dads are awesome" (I still am btw) and at the start I questioned the motives this poster had. Things have changed though. His offer to settle is bs. You never would have offered that even as broke as you were. There are plenty of dads on here who would not have offered/settled either. His offer is about money plain and simple. Stop trying to argue differently because its not going to work. Any parent wanting to see their kids would have put forward an offer with full support for 50/50. This guy wants to reduce support, reduce daycare, stop paying at 18 regardless of what the kids are doing AND asked for less than 40%.

Come on LF32, let it go already.
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  #43 (permalink)  
Old 06-30-2017, 06:04 PM
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I have nothing against Angie. She's well-versed and seems like a great person/parent. I just don't think it would have killed her to at least try an equal relationshi when dad requested it. Sorry if my opinion upsets some .. but I don't think I'm being too crazy here.
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  #44 (permalink)  
Old 07-01-2017, 12:06 AM
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Originally Posted by rockscan View Post
Considering that my partner was seen as a money grubbing deadbeat in the beginning I would be a chief player in the camp of "dads are awesome" (I still am btw) and at the start I questioned the motives this poster had. Things have changed though. His offer to settle is bs. You never would have offered that even as broke as you were. There are plenty of dads on here who would not have offered/settled either. His offer is about money plain and simple. Stop trying to argue differently because its not going to work. Any parent wanting to see their kids would have put forward an offer with full support for 50/50. This guy wants to reduce support, reduce daycare, stop paying at 18 regardless of what the kids are doing AND asked for less than 40%.

Come on LF32, let it go already.
If it was about money to the father then he would have also (in addition to his offer w.r.t education) proposed 50-50 with offset child support - not less than 40% with _full_ child support. I think he's just mocking and taunting Ange with his offer.

By the way, the trial judge doesn't get to see offers until the trial has concluded.

He is asking for 50-50 in his application.

saying the father should propose 50-50 with no offset is no different than saying the mother should accept less than 40% with full child support and give up educational gaurantees. One parent gets disadvantaged financially either way.

Last edited by trinton; 07-01-2017 at 12:19 AM.
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  #45 (permalink)  
Old 07-01-2017, 09:36 AM
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Originally Posted by trinton View Post
If it was about money to the father then he would have also (in addition to his offer w.r.t education) proposed 50-50 with offset child support - not less than 40% with _full_ child support. I think he's just mocking and taunting Ange with his offer.

By the way, the trial judge doesn't get to see offers until the trial has concluded.

He is asking for 50-50 in his application.

saying the father should propose 50-50 with no offset is no different than saying the mother should accept less than 40% with full child support and give up educational gaurantees. One parent gets disadvantaged financially either way.


No, he is not asking for 50/50 in his application.
Also, he did not ask for almost 40% with full support. He asked for almost 40% but with a significantly reduced CS and wants to eliminate the daycare payment.
Side note: we just had mediation, which failed. I offered week on week off in the summers to keep the school year schedule somewhat similar. He declined the 50/50 summer because "it doesn't work in his schedule". I also offered a consistent pattern-like school year schedule that was very close to the amount he is seeking (around 40%) but he declined again because it doesn't use all of HIS days off. He doesn't want to ever use daycare. He thinks if he can make the access schedule cater perfectly to his work schedule then it justifies not paying for his kids in daycare. I told him it shouldn't be all about him. I have plenty of days off that I don't have the kids and by that logic I should see them every single weekend since those are my only days off.
He left saying he'd speak to his employer about it but I am doubtful he is going to consider the kids instead of himself.



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  #46 (permalink)  
Old 07-01-2017, 11:48 AM
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Originally Posted by Ange71727 View Post
No, he is not asking for 50/50 in his application.
Also, he did not ask for almost 40% with full support. He asked for almost 40% but with a significantly reduced CS and wants to eliminate the daycare payment.
Side note: we just had mediation, which failed. I offered week on week off in the summers to keep the school year schedule somewhat similar. He declined the 50/50 summer because "it doesn't work in his schedule". I also offered a consistent pattern-like school year schedule that was very close to the amount he is seeking (around 40%) but he declined again because it doesn't use all of HIS days off. He doesn't want to ever use daycare. He thinks if he can make the access schedule cater perfectly to his work schedule then it justifies not paying for his kids in daycare. I told him it shouldn't be all about him. I have plenty of days off that I don't have the kids and by that logic I should see them every single weekend since those are my only days off.
He left saying he'd speak to his employer about it but I am doubtful he is going to consider the kids instead of himself.



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In your first few posts on this forum you said he was seeking 50-50.

You have posted multiple threads inquiring about offset and in one thread multiple posters calculated his proposal to be over 40%.

He is seeking 40%, and in addition, he wants all times child is in daycare

You have offered 50-50 throughout summer.

I have 2 questions for you. If he is good enough of a parent for 50-50 in the summer then why is he not good enough for 50-50 during the school year? and don't say something ridiculous like "he doesn't help them with homework". That's the oldest trick in the book.

Why should the child be with a stranger (a.k.a. babysitter) and unnecessary costs be created as a result , when the father is available and good enough of a parent to have the kids for half the time in the summer?

If you should have all weekends since that's your only times off then are you suggesting the children shouldn't ever have a weekend with dad? or are you suggesting that you work from 6am to midnight everyday and that a stranger (as opposed to the father) is raising your kids for you during those times?

Last edited by trinton; 07-01-2017 at 11:51 AM.
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  #47 (permalink)  
Old 07-01-2017, 12:30 PM
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I believe that initially he was resistant to paying/adjusting his CS in accordance with his income. He was chronically in arrears. After that he proposed 50-50 to reduce amount he had to pay. He has consistently indicated that he only wants the children when it is convenient to him.

If he was sincere in desire to spend more time with his children one would think he would jump at the offer for 50/50 in the summer.

poster stated "He doesn't want to ever use daycare. He thinks if he can make the access schedule cater perfectly to his work schedule then it justifies not paying for his kids in daycare."

Sharing custody of children requires both parents to be flexible and give and take. It sounds to me like the father is refusing to be flexible and only seeks a child-raising schedule which is convenient to him. I doubt a judge would rule in his favor.
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Old 07-01-2017, 01:38 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by trinton View Post
In your first few posts on this forum you said he was seeking 50-50.

You have posted multiple threads inquiring about offset and in one thread multiple posters calculated his proposal to be over 40%.

He is seeking 40%, and in addition, he wants all times child is in daycare

You have offered 50-50 throughout summer.

I have 2 questions for you. If he is good enough of a parent for 50-50 in the summer then why is he not good enough for 50-50 during the school year? and don't say something ridiculous like "he doesn't help them with homework". That's the oldest trick in the book.

Why should the child be with a stranger (a.k.a. babysitter) and unnecessary costs be created as a result , when the father is available and good enough of a parent to have the kids for half the time in the summer?

If you should have all weekends since that's your only times off then are you suggesting the children shouldn't ever have a weekend with dad? or are you suggesting that you work from 6am to midnight everyday and that a stranger (as opposed to the father) is raising your kids for you during those times?


So you are in favour of Dad having children on his days off, but mom shouldn't be allowed the same? That's a good double standard you are proposing. A proper 50-50 access schedule doesn't always work around days off and that's all dad wants... he wants the kids only on his days off so he doesn't have to pay for daycare. Truth is, he would have to pay regardless because daycare would be required for Mom to work.

You are soooo stuck on this 50-50, which in most cases it should be but in THIS case Dad only wants 50-50 if it 100% suits his schedule. God forbid dad would actually have to be a parent and drop off/pick up from daycare. How do you propose school works if Dad only wants the kids on his days off?? Dad doesn't truly want 50-50, he only wants to pay less support.

Tell me Triton, if your ex offered you 50-50 in the summer would you have turned it down because it didn't suit your schedule?


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Old 07-01-2017, 02:30 PM
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Originally Posted by Berner_Faith View Post
So you are in favour of Dad having children on his days off, but mom shouldn't be allowed the same? That's a good double standard you are proposing. A proper 50-50 access schedule doesn't always work around days off and that's all dad wants... he wants the kids only on his days off so he doesn't have to pay for daycare. Truth is, he would have to pay regardless because daycare would be required for Mom to work.

You are soooo stuck on this 50-50, which in most cases it should be but in THIS case Dad only wants 50-50 if it 100% suits his schedule. God forbid dad would actually have to be a parent and drop off/pick up from daycare. How do you propose school works if Dad only wants the kids on his days off?? Dad doesn't truly want 50-50, he only wants to pay less support.

Tell me Triton, if your ex offered you 50-50 in the summer would you have turned it down because it didn't suit your schedule?


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To me that is the telling fact right there - he can't make a 50/50 summer work because it may mean he has to use daycare or outside help and he won't be with the children on all of his days off. I called his bluff and was right. He wants to orchestrate the entire access schedule to mirror his days off. And even then it isn't 50/50 because he can't swing it. The mediator agreed with me on this one. I guess I should ask for every Saturday and Sunday with the kids instead of splitting them equally in the month then since those are MY only days off. If he can't make things work with his employer or puts his work schedule before his kids' schedule, is that my problem?


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Old 07-01-2017, 02:39 PM
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Originally Posted by trinton View Post
In your first few posts on this forum you said he was seeking 50-50.

You have posted multiple threads inquiring about offset and in one thread multiple posters calculated his proposal to be over 40%.

He is seeking 40%, and in addition, he wants all times child is in daycare

You have offered 50-50 throughout summer.

I have 2 questions for you. If he is good enough of a parent for 50-50 in the summer then why is he not good enough for 50-50 during the school year? and don't say something ridiculous like "he doesn't help them with homework". That's the oldest trick in the book.

Why should the child be with a stranger (a.k.a. babysitter) and unnecessary costs be created as a result , when the father is available and good enough of a parent to have the kids for half the time in the summer?

If you should have all weekends since that's your only times off then are you suggesting the children shouldn't ever have a weekend with dad? or are you suggesting that you work from 6am to midnight everyday and that a stranger (as opposed to the father) is raising your kids for you during those times?


He doesn't want 50/50 during the school year Trinton. Of course I don't actually think I should have every weekend. I am facetiously pointing out that his logic is flawed.


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