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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #11 (permalink)  
Old 11-30-2016, 08:19 AM
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Well the question is valid. Is being petty on a court ordered increase worth it?

The poster was using a ridiculous argument to avoid cs and I was using a ridiculous argument back.

There are plenty of women out there who use cs for new hair, new nails, new shoes, bingo and vacations. But turning around and saying youre not going to pay because she gets too much money doesnt help the dads who pay. It just adds one more notch to the deadbeat column that makes all dads look bad.

Ill also note that there are plenty of dads on here who have been successful against an ex using legal aid and/or the welfare system.
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  #12 (permalink)  
Old 11-30-2016, 09:15 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Links17 View Post
Child support is public order which means it should always be correct by any means necessary. Agree to pay the proper amount now.

However, can you explain why you don't have shared custody (or why you lost it?). Maybe we can help with that...

And yes, child support is privatized welfare and is as much as the state thinks it can get away with where the majority of men won't just flee the country...
With response as to why I lost custody, the answer is simple - my ex wants to hurt me, and uses the children to do so. I had custody of my children every weekend for the last 3 years. This was just an agreement made between us, nothing formal through the courts. Earlier this year I got engaged, and my ex flipped out and served me with custody papers. In the original papers I was to have custody every weekend from Friday at 6:00 pm to Sunday at 6:00 pm. Then one weekend she was mad at me over something ridiculous. So on Monday she went to her lawyer and amended the documents, saying that now I am only worthy of having the kids every second weekend. I am totally devastated by this, but simply cannot afford to keep up the fight. I've maxed out all the credit cards on this, and just have no savings. So I lost.
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Old 11-30-2016, 03:06 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by StandUpDad View Post
So on Monday she went to her lawyer and amended the documents, saying that now I am only worthy of having the kids every second weekend.
Who gave her the right to make that decision?

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simply cannot afford to keep up the fight. I've maxed out all the credit cards on this, and just have no savings. So I lost.
Ah, you gave her the right.

I honestly don't get why fathers are so willing to capitulate. Tradition? An inability by males to engage in long-term thinking? Poor support networks leading to improper advice?
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  #14 (permalink)  
Old 11-30-2016, 03:21 PM
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Janus - it's simply the difference between someone having unlimited legal support with legal aid, and someone who is already struggling to pay their bills, and then having to pay for a lawyer. People are so quick to lay blame, and be judgmental. It cost me over $6000.00 in legal fees to lose. Lawyer advised to save up some more money and try again in 2 years. Great advice....
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Old 11-30-2016, 06:04 PM
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Threads like this only make me shake my head even more. Most of you already know my situation, but I will repeat the short version of it for StandUpDad. My 1st court date will be next week, for a motion I filed to terminate CS, for my son who will be turning 20 this July but still five credits short of his school diploma. He's been enrolled at a specialized learning institution for students all of all kinds to obtain high school credits, by being given learning material to complete at their own comfort level. Those of you curious, this is the school:

PAS North

Evidently, he's been enrolled in this institution even before he turned 18, which tends to suggest he has difficulty functioning in a normal high school. His transcripts indicate a GPA of 50 to 60%.

Mom (ex-psycho bitch), of course disagrees with my request from the courts. She too, has been on ODSP since we've been separated (around 2003). I've been paying my CS religiously too, by direct depositing the funds to her account every month (adjusting the amount every July to reflect the table for my income the year previous), up until last year when I began to question whether or not I should continue paying. Since I've been alienated from my son since 2007, I don't know what his career plans are, other than to "go to college". But the marks showing on his transcripts clearly don't indicate that of someone who cares too much about his academic achievement.

I too, see this pattern of women getting this easy free ride by having child(ren) from men who work, while collecting money off the government (either by welfare or disability). CS and welfare. Why bother working? If a woman can have a baby from two or more men of modest to high income, their life is set. I almost believe the system not only empowers it, but encourages it.
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  #16 (permalink)  
Old 11-30-2016, 07:15 PM
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Self-representing is the solution.

@SUD - did you sign a document agreeing to the change or make any sign indicating that you agreed?

When did this latest change happen? I assume it was every weekend just before that for a long time?

With an EVERY weekend arrangement, I think I can get you into a shared custody situation.

If somebody were to kidnap your child, would you call the police and wait?
What difference if that kidnapper happens to be your ex-wife....? Fight and if you die in the struggle at least it was for something worth dying for.
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  #17 (permalink)  
Old 11-30-2016, 08:07 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Links17 View Post
Self-representing is the solution.

@SUD - did you sign a document agreeing to the change or make any sign indicating that you agreed?

When did this latest change happen? I assume it was every weekend just before that for a long time?

With an EVERY weekend arrangement, I think I can get you into a shared custody situation.

If somebody were to kidnap your child, would you call the police and wait?
What difference if that kidnapper happens to be your ex-wife....? Fight and if you die in the struggle at least it was for something worth dying for.
I agree so much. My daughter was worth more than any dollar amount. Links is right on here. Self repping is (was) the next logical step. You fight your ass off even if it means you learn the entire family law system, have no sleep and think you're going to die.

Legal aid is there to wear you down and make you kiss their feet. Their only prerogative is to tire you out. When I felt worn out I thought about my daughter and that love transformed into motivation. Screw legal aid and their dirty tactics and inability to follow the primary objectives of family law ........ just kick their ass in court....even if it means becoming a hybrid lawyer yourself.
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Old 12-01-2016, 12:54 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Janus View Post
I honestly don't get why fathers are so willing to capitulate. Tradition? An inability by males to engage in long-term thinking? Poor support networks leading to improper advice?
All of the above.
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