Changes to Court Order

[KLM27]

I have been divorced for 5 years and I have custody of my child. My ex-h continuously threatens, bullies and harasses me in violation of our court order. He is now apparently filing an application for a variation to the provisions of the court order, particularly with respect to custody and support. I only receive the Federal Guideline amount of child support from him but he says that there is a significant change in my material circumstances because my fiancee is now living with me and we are getting married later this year.

Can he legally make changes to the order? The original long and nasty court battle to obtain the current order cost me a significant amount of money and I do not want to incur any more legal costs. I have been contacted by my ex's lawyer asking for my legal counsel's contact information, but I don't wish to retain counsel unless I can go after my ex for my legal costs if he drags me into court.

The constant emails and telephone calls both at home and at work from my ex are becoming too much for me and I'm considering trying to get a restraining order against him in order to finally enforce the contact provisions of the court order!

I feel like I'm being forced into incurring a great expense again and I'm finding it incredibly stressful, especially given my pending wedding and my fiancee's issues with his ex too!

Can anyone offer advice or a course of action?????

[dadtotheend]

Don't worry about a thing. Your fiance's income won't affect CS at all.

[representingself]

Your ex can claim undue hardship and bring you and your fiancees finances into a household standard of living comparison...

But even if he proves that there is a substantial difference in your respective financial circumstances he as a VERY SLIM chance of winning a less than Guideline support order.

VERY,VERY SLIM.... almost impossible.

Let him spend his money on a Lawyer, fighting a useless battle... don't let him suck you into his legal game.

File your own response, wait for the Case Conference, and the Case Conference Judge should tell him right then and there that he has a snowballs chance in hell.

[KLM27]

Thanks so much for your reply~

Should I be applying for a restraining order in the meantime?

Also, what are the chances of him asking for half time with my child? Would a judge grant it and would he get to cut his child support in half? I have kept a daily journal for the past 6 years of his abusive behavour and inability to do his regular scheduled time of 1 night a week and every second weekend.

My ex has also been living common law with partner for over 3 years, but still claims his status on his income tax return as separated? Not sure who he is separated from, as he his clearly divorced from me and still lives with her.

So, if my ex does bring a motion to court can we go after his new commom law partners income as " household income" if he goes after my fiancee's income? Keep in mind my fiancee pays over half his salary to his ex for spousal and child support!

[NBDad]

Your ex can claim undue hardship and bring you and your fiancees finances into a household standard of living comparison...

and if he does, HIS new partner's income comes into play. The only time a new partner will affect CS is with a claim of undue hardship. (The differences in household income must be DRASTIC, and even then he doesn't have much chance)

Should I be applying for a restraining order in the meantime?

You mention the "contact provisions of the original order"? What are they?

I assume you have phone and email records showing excessive contact? If so then yeah, couldn't hurt (may escalate things). A good first step (before doing the whole restraining order route) might be to request via email to him that he cease and desist phone contact to your home as the you feel the excessive contact constitutes harrassment. If he refuses, or doesn't stop, change the phone number and tell him all further contact must be in email so it's documented.

Also, what are the chances of him asking for half time with my child?

What is the status quo and how long has it been in place? Courts HATE to break status quo without a really good reason. He can ask all he likes, he won't get it right away unless he can prove he already has it.

Would a judge grant it and would he get to cut his child support in half?

No. and no. IF he gets the child in excess of 40% (ie. at least 3 days in 7), typically what would happen is that the court would look at what he has to pay you, what you have to pay him, and the person with the lower income would get whatever the difference is.

But if there is already an established status quo, he'd need to show that he already has the child over 40%, or have really good reason to break status quo. (He may try to ask for an extra day, or an extra weekend, but if he isn't keeping his current schedule NOW and you can prove it...he's probably SOL)

I have kept a daily journal for the past 6 years of his abusive behavour and inability to do his regular scheduled time of 1 night a week and every second weekend.

Good. Now cut phone contact with him and make him put this stuff down via email (ie. WRITING) too. Journal's are great, but having email records FROM him stating that he can't make his schedule access times....priceless.

My ex has also been living common law with partner for over 3 years, but still claims his status on his income tax return as separated? Not sure who he is separated from, as he his clearly divorced from me and still lives with her.

Were the two of you actually married? Did you do the whole "divorce route"? If so, call CCRA and report him?

Keep in mind my fiancee pays over half his salary to his ex for spousal and child support!

Your fiancee counts that payment as part of his expenses on the financial calculation sheet for undue hardship (virtually the ONLY time he can be brought into things). Your ex counts the CS he currently pays as an expense, and you count the CS you receive as an income.