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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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Old 04-19-2017, 11:21 PM
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Default Case Conference #2 Was Almost a Complete 180

Well folks, today's case conference was a complete, night and day difference to how my 1st case conference went. For those of you unfamiliar and so inclined to read:

http://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/f...-my-2nd-20820/

Now.....for today's case conference, it appears the judge (yes, the same judge A. W. J. Sullivan) did not address the issues of arrears ($768), S.7 expenses or possible termination clauses as was specified in the temporary order issued as a result of CC #1 in January. Two things likely played a HUGE role as to why today's CC went much better than last time's. My form 17 brief for today's CC simply respectfully disagreed with the judge's finding that my son remain defined as a "child of marriage" during the last CC. I then went on to request that my ex submit: doctor's diagnosis, IEP and past report cards to substantiate her allegations that my son had "difficulties" during the last CC to explain why completing an entire school year with only 1.5 credits obtained can be justified.

Second.....and most important of all, I approached the court to request that my current partner be allowed to speak on my behalf, citing the reason that I have an extreme aversion to public speaking (a phobia if you will). As I requested this to the judge, I was white as a ghost and visibly nervous, and the judge asked my partner approach as well. From that moment on, she did most of the speaking while I sat as expressionless as possible. This, is when the tables took a drastic turn to the detriment of my ex. For starters, we served and filed our 17 brief and 13 financial as well as 14 confirmation to the ex, two days earlier than needed. We did NOT get served a response (nor was her response filed). She literally waltzed into the courtroom handing us her response as well as a copy to the judge. Her explanation that she didn't have enough time to file her response. The judge called BS immediately, but grudgingly allowed it. So right off the bat, she pissed off the judge. She (the ex) begins the conversation by explaining to the court that she does not have a doctor's diagnosis, an IEP or any kind of documented evaluation of any kind as we've requested. She then goes off on a tangent to say that "Ms. D* F***** should understand as a mother herself of an asthmatic son, that he is constantly sick BLAH BLAH BLAH......" referring to my partner's son. So basically, she grasping at straws to say that he missed school a lot, and this was overwhelming for him to catch and BLAH BLAH BLAH, and that's why he needed to be enrolled into an alternative learning institution. The judge then asks if we have been provided with his report card. At this point, my ex is doing the "Um um um....." while frantically shuffling papers, and pointing out that she submitted an official letter by the principal confirming enrollment in his present learning institution as well as his transcript (which we've already had all along). The judge, immediately interrupts her and says, "ma'am transcripts and letters only indicate courses taken and enrollment, it does not indicate attendance or performance". This is where things get juicy. She then says, in a snarly tone of voice, "well then Ms. D* F****** can subpoena the school for that information..." only to be interrupted by the judge yet again, "ma'am if you think I am going to turn my courtroom into a circus of school board members and lawyers you've got another thing coming. You WILL be submitting a letter to grant permission for the release of what Mr. C*** requests". At this point, my partner stands up, and points out that we've attempted on numerous occasions to have the school release the information to us, but because of my son's age (he's 19 now) they can't by law. So now, the judge asks my son to come forward. He now addresses both my son and the ex that they are both each to provide a letter to both the school and school board to grant permission to release the information I request. Failing which, as the judge puts it, "your case is not looking good, and I will have to no choice but to grant Mr. C***'s request to terminate CS". I am certain, that at that point my ex was shitting her pants.

Now onto other issues. My ex then starts on about the arrears. Yet again, the judge just completely shut her down, and simply told her he's not prepared to address that. Not only that, he actually blatantly told her he hears cases of $150,000 in arrears, $300,000 in arrears so on and so forth. My ex then replies, "well your honour, I only make $16,000 and every penny counts..." at which point the judge simply told her, "Ms. C*** your ex husband is clearly not a deadbeat dad, so I am not prepared to address that at this point. She then produces a letter of conditional acceptance to the college for the program applied for, along with an invoice for fees including a registration fee of $500. The judge simply told her to put it on her credit card (YEAH RIGHT!!!). He then asks if OSAP has been applied for, which my ex promptly replied NO. Now, the judge is really getting frazzled by my ex. He then asks why (with a complete WTF look on his face), to which my ex has no response for. At this point, the judge tells her to apply for OSAP and GET ON IT.

WOW WOW WOW.... my ex has REALLY shot herself in the foot today. She seems extremely evasive and resistant to providing report card information to us. I have to now wonder what information that will reveal.

In any event, it's onto CC #3 in August....
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Old 04-20-2017, 10:49 AM
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Great news , I'm so glad it went well for you
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Old 04-26-2017, 08:30 PM
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What a great update, I was wondering how your file had progressed. Have you had any opportunities to deal with your adult child directly and/or try to encourage that relationship with him?
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Old 04-26-2017, 10:59 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mcdreamy View Post
What a great update, I was wondering how your file had progressed. Have you had any opportunities to deal with your adult child directly and/or try to encourage that relationship with him?
NOPE.

My partner and I felt it not to be a good idea for now, due to the ongoing motion in progress. His mother is very likely influencing him heavily of the idea that I'm only trying to cut them off financially, which makes me the "bad guy".

The quick version of how things have gone down:

CC #1:

Ex-wife put me through FRO, under allegations of having "problems" getting CS.

Ex-wife tells judge my son will be completing his HS diploma by the end of this school year, and will be taking a "six year college program" (what she really meant is TWO three year college programs).

My CS got increased from $610 to $738 (due to my income). Arrears calculated to $768 due to me not increasing my quantum back in July of 2016 to reflect the new amount of my income for the 2015 year. The reason for not increasing the quantum was due to me not being sure if I should still be paying CS in the first place, as well as my intention to proceed with the motion.

CC #2:

I requested my ex-wife produce numerous documents to explain why son only completed 1.5 credits for the entire school year previous. Only an enrolment letter from the learning institution and transcript was provided. No IEP, report cards or doctors diagnostics (for learning disability) was provided to substantiate legitimate reasons for "difficulties" alleged by ex-wife during CC #1. Only a stupid excuse that my current partner should understand as a mother of an asthmatic child herself, that child will be sick from time to time and need to miss school.

Judge lambasts ex-wife, threatening to grant my request to terminate CS, if ex-wife refuses to produce past and present report cards to indicate performance, attendance and progress. As a result, both my son and ex-wife are each ordered to submit letters to myself and school board within 30 days, granting me permission to access report cards or any other information I may request from present and past learning institutions. The ex-wife made it pretty obvious to the judge she is extremely resistant to providing that information. I have to wonder why....

CC #3 is scheduled for mid August. I have to wonder what the outcome of that will be....oh, and he will be 20 by then, and still two credits short of his HS diploma, assuming he completes the three courses he's enrolled in this school year.
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Old 04-27-2017, 12:13 PM
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I would suggest that you and your lawyer prepare your own authorization/release forms for your ex and son to sign at the next CC. Perhaps your lawyer can fire those off right away. Expect them to be ignored but the two of them would be compelled to sign them at the next CC in front of the judge. In other words, have everything drafted ahead of time so that your ex and son just need to sign.
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Old 04-27-2017, 08:33 PM
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What a disaster for your kid, I hope your ex gets her act together.

Has she even told you if he is enrolled in any summer programs, to try to earn those extra credits, or is he waiting on fall enrolment? There is no excuse for 'missing' post-secondary classes - courses are offered online and information exchanged between students if dates are missed.

Has your lawyer considered making any further settlement offers, if she provides the required info, before the next cc?
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Old 05-01-2017, 09:56 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mcdreamy View Post
What a disaster for your kid, I hope your ex gets her act together.
Didn't happen when I was with her. Didn't happen when we split up. And sure as hell isn't going to happen now, or likely for the rest of her life. Yes, she seems to have brought my son up to someone who is extremely lazy, and dare I say it, useless like her.

Quote:
Originally Posted by mcdreamy View Post
Has she even told you if he is enrolled in any summer programs, to try to earn those extra credits, or is he waiting on fall enrolment? There is no excuse for 'missing' post-secondary classes - courses are offered online and information exchanged between students if dates are missed.
He's not enrolled in any post-secondary institution. He's enrolled in an "alternative" learning institution. Here's the website:

PAS North

Back in the summer of 2015, he was 6.5 credits short of completing his HS diploma. I was asked to continue paying CS for another year, due to his shortfall. I did so without question. Fast forward to the summer of 2016, I am told he needs yet another year, but at this time I'm unsure of how many credits he is still short.....until I am provided with an enrolment letter, timetable and updated school record for the 2016/2017 school year. Upon receipt of those, is when I discover only 1.5 credits obtained for the entire 2015/2016 school. THIS, is what prompts me to commence this motion that I now have in progress. No explanation of night school, summer school or any other method of expediting the process to complete his HS credits. Oh, and he "can't" work.

Quote:
Originally Posted by mcdreamy View Post
Has your lawyer considered making any further settlement offers, if she provides the required info, before the next cc?
I don't have a lawyer. Can't afford one right now. Right now, I'm waiting for the updated variation to the order that came from CC #2, as well as the letters my son and mom have been ordered to provide, granting me authorization to access past report cards and any other information I request. I'm not even prepared to offer any kind of settlement offer at this point, until I get my hands on those report cards to see what information it reveals, that my ex-wife seems extremely resistant to provide. The more resistant she is, at providing it, the more curious I am to see what it contains.
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