Ottawa Divorce .com Forums


User CP

New posts

Advertising

  Ottawa Divorce .com Forums > Main Category > Divorce & Family Law

Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
  #1 (permalink)  
Old 10-08-2015, 01:50 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 65
blendedinsanity is on a distinguished road
Default Amended Case Conference Brief

Another day another drama. A couple of days ago the ex emailed my partner and demanded to meet with him and told him if he didn't she was going to destroy him. She did the email not in English I guess thinking it couldn't be used against her. He refused to meet with her. Yesterday he got an email from the Trial Coordinator saying that they had allowed her to file an amended case conference brief because her deadline had not yet passed and she claimed she had just come in to possession of some new information and materials.

The new brief, in addition to more claims about me includes pictures of MY children that my step-son took on one vacation including a picture where my daughter is drinking what is obviously a root beer but she's claiming it wasn't root beer. She also included a picture of my son in his bathing suit claiming that he's being malnourished and underfed. He has very documented health issues that cause him to be extremely skinny. She added that her son told her that the kids have complained that I am not a good mother. So the first question is - how is this allowed? How can pictures of my children be used when I'm not even a party to the case. I KNOW her intention was to upset me and it has worked which I hate, but what I hate even more is that my children are being used as pawns in this bullshit game.

The second thing that was added was a claim that my partner has alienated their older child from her and she included text messages from their son where he said he hated her and never wanted to see her again. No mention of my partner in the texts and she conveniently forgot to include the texts that led up to this. The two have had a strained relationship for years. When he was 16 that altercation happened between my partner and his ex where she was arrested and the restraining order was put in place. During that incident she had wanted their son to lie to the police and say his dad had pushed her. He refused to lie and she kicked him out - she had the police take him and his belongings out of the house.

He has tried off and on over the years to have a relationship with his mother but it always ends up going badly. While we were on vacation (the now 21 year old step-son didn't come), the two apparently got into an argument and his mother went off - all documented by text or email. She was saying really vile things to him and she messaged his girlfriend on Facebook saying racist, horrible things. That was when he sent the message saying that he hated her and never wanted to see her again and he blocked her phone and email.

Is there a way to refute her alienation claims without dragging their son into it? We were reading that using second hand texts and emails can be problematic but can he provide them and say that his son gave them to him? The absolute last thing he wants is to have to involve him whether by affidavit or whatever but if he just ignores the claim won't that look like an admission? Or is that what he should do?

Thank you.
Reply With Quote
  #2 (permalink)  
Old 10-08-2015, 04:48 PM
arabian's Avatar
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Western Canada
Posts: 9,865
arabian will become famous soon enough
Default

Very upsetting indeed.

I do not think there is anything you can do about this. Police would not do anything because the matter is "before the courts." You were made privy to confidential email communication (your partner's choice to show you). What she submits for her brief, ludicrous as it may be, cannot be held against her. It may sink her case but that will be decided at the time of the conference or motion.

I would suggest that you seek legal counsel to find out if there are any options available to you (doubt it as the brief was intended for your husband, not you).
Reply With Quote
  #3 (permalink)  
Old 10-08-2015, 09:45 PM
blinkandimgone's Avatar
Moderator
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Lucknow
Posts: 5,175
blinkandimgone has a spectacular aura aboutblinkandimgone has a spectacular aura aboutblinkandimgone has a spectacular aura about
Default

Honestly, I would simply ignore everything that doesn't pertain to his children as this is what is relevant. If she had valid concerns about your children's health and treatment she would be calling CAS not filing information with the court completely unrelated to her own children.

Neither you or your children are party to the case, if your partner feels he must respond to each point it can simply be in the form of "vehemently deny this claim."

There isn't anything a court is going to so regarding the 21 year old as he is an adult and free to make his own decisions. I would leave this one alone entirely. There is absolutely no need or benefit to refuting her claims as there is nothing the judge can or would order regards grown child of the marriage. If your partner wishes to gather the documentation, or if the son wishes to write his own affidavit and your partner have everything on hand should a judge ask about it, he could bring it along.

She's merely mudslinging to get to you and the more your partner responds to it the more it feeds her mission.

Stick to the absolute relevant facts of the case and do not get siderailed into the garbage.
Reply With Quote
  #4 (permalink)  
Old 10-08-2015, 11:31 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 65
blendedinsanity is on a distinguished road
Default

Thanks for the replies! He's come up with a new strategy to avoid getting in the garbage with her that he's very excited about. Don't know what it is and not asking - I just want quiet in our lives!
Reply With Quote
  #5 (permalink)  
Old 10-09-2015, 12:11 AM
arabian's Avatar
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Western Canada
Posts: 9,865
arabian will become famous soon enough
Default

If the deluded woman included text messages from her own son where he says he hates her then that, combined with the fact she has a shaky past (previous restraining orders) will do nothing to help her. People like these tend to implode and are their own worst enemies.

If the matter escalates then talk to the police and see how you can best protect yourself. Sounds like she is on a mission and if she has mental health problems then you should watch your back. Hopefully your partner has the good sense to cut communication with her and let the court deal with the matter.
Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
case conference.. gsmommy Parenting Issues 7 07-08-2013 07:23 AM
Case Law, Case Conference and Mediation Free-spirit Divorce & Family Law 5 09-30-2012 09:55 PM
Case Conference Held Nadia Divorce & Family Law 6 07-21-2012 06:43 PM
Case Conference Preparation - Questions Ontario Parenting Issues 4 01-17-2011 08:48 AM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 01:34 AM.