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Domestic Violence Dealing with abuse and violence. Getting support and help.

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  #31 (permalink)  
Old 10-22-2009, 12:43 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by representingself View Post
Listen buddy..... I already apologized to Edward for my rash response to his post....

I am a 5'2 120 pound woman who has had the chit kicked out of me what feels like hundreds of times by one of my ex boyfriends... I have had teeth replaced and was thrown down a flight of stairs...so don't you dare tell ME that I have no idea.

It is NEVER ok to hit anyone and especially WRONG for a physically stronger, larger person to hit a smaller, weaker person!!

A 6'2'', 230 pound man (as you are) can easily restrain or remove himself from physical abuse by a woman... unless she was at least 6'2'' and 230 pounds as well!!

There is NO self defense there...

Hitting a woman is paramount to a pitbull fighting a Chihuahua!
BTW, my wife is as tall as me, and slightly heavier than me. so you are saying she can be aggressive and abusive because she's got the right size for it?

so you are claiming that a smaller person can constantly provoke, psychologically torture, as well as punch, kick, bite, etc a bigger person?

the size or gender of a person shouldn't play a role. when domestic violence occurs, it's not necessarily always the case where the husband is simply insanely crazy, drunk and abusive. there are many men out there who take all kinds of insults, constant provocation, physical aggression, etc, then as a last resort, restrain the abusive wife physically. then as usual, she cries, claims she was abused and pretends to be the victim. is there any name for that kind of behavior?
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  #32 (permalink)  
Old 10-22-2009, 09:13 AM
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[quote=helplessDad;29107]

so you are claiming that a smaller person can constantly provoke, psychologically torture, as well as punch, kick, bite, etc a bigger person?

[quote]

That is NOT what she said. And she also said that UNless the woman was of comparable size....

Given that you wife IS of comparable size and weight, it makes sense that you were not able to restrain her.

Nobody is pointing fingers here. there was a misunderstanding, and it has been cleared up. Please read the entire thread before getting hot-headed. It is hard to reveal your whole story as things are so personal, and many of us have had horrible things happen to us. Give her a break...Edward did.
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  #33 (permalink)  
Old 10-22-2009, 04:36 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by helplessDad View Post
BTW.....there are many men out there who take all kinds of insults, constant provocation, physical aggression, etc, then as a last resort, restrain the abusive wife physically. then as usual, she cries, claims she was abused and pretends to be the victim. is there any name for that kind of behavior?
Spousal abuse happens to men as well - it's just not reported.
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  #34 (permalink)  
Old 10-22-2009, 05:29 PM
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You guys only read, hear and speak what you WANT to...

No one said that abuse is one sided.

Biased eh???

Thanks Billie
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  #35 (permalink)  
Old 10-22-2009, 08:08 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by representingself View Post
Listen buddy..... I already apologized to Edward for my rash response to his post....

I am a 5'2 120 pound woman who has had the chit kicked out of me what feels like hundreds of times by one of my ex boyfriends... I have had teeth replaced and was thrown down a flight of stairs...so don't you dare tell ME that I have no idea.

It is NEVER ok to hit anyone and especially WRONG for a physically stronger, larger person to hit a smaller, weaker person!!

A 6'2'', 230 pound man (as you are) can easily restrain or remove himself from physical abuse by a woman... unless she was at least 6'2'' and 230 pounds as well!!

There is NO self defense there...

Hitting a woman is paramount to a pitbull fighting a Chihuahua!
You don't have ANY IDEA of what I have gone through just as I have none about you. So can the blanket gender prescriptions for how people ought to act.

Why didn't you walk away after the first time? You don't have to be 6'2" 230lbs to leave him. You hung around for hundreds of beatings. Not as simple as that is it?

Why is it that men who get the crap beat out of them are blamed? It's their fault that they didn't leave, or they acted in self-defense?

When I said self-defense, I meant restraint, not beating her up.

Walking away didn't work very well when I got blindsided by a heavy hotel lamp swung into my ribs from behind and could barely walk for days due to the injuries.

Don't kid yourself. Women are not immune from being physically abusive. Chihuahua vs a pitball eh? PFFFT!

Last edited by dadtotheend; 10-22-2009 at 08:16 PM.
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  #36 (permalink)  
Old 10-27-2009, 01:33 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dadtotheend View Post
You don't have ANY IDEA of what I have gone through just as I have none about you. So can the blanket gender prescriptions for how people ought to act.

Why didn't you walk away after the first time? You don't have to be 6'2" 230lbs to leave him. You hung around for hundreds of beatings. Not as simple as that is it?

Why is it that men who get the crap beat out of them are blamed? It's their fault that they didn't leave, or they acted in self-defense?

When I said self-defense, I meant restraint, not beating her up.

Walking away didn't work very well when I got blindsided by a heavy hotel lamp swung into my ribs from behind and could barely walk for days due to the injuries.

Don't kid yourself. Women are not immune from being physically abusive. Chihuahua vs a pitball eh? PFFFT!
I am sorry if I offended you, but you are twisting my words.

I won't agree that domestic violence is acceptable, under any circumstances.... regardless of gender.

And I certainly wont agree that it is ok for a larger, stronger person to physically strike another smaller, weaker person... male or female.

I know that both women and men can be guilty of physical-emotional-mental abuse.... and all of it is wrong!

Spousal Abuse is also NOT limited to heterosexual relationships... so I apply my beliefs to same sex unions as well...

PEOPLE come in all shapes and sizes, and each and every one of us is capable of doing terrible things...

Violence is not gender biased!

So again, my words were not meant to hurt or offend you.... I do not know you, or anything about you. I believe that you have suffered...and I am sorry for that.
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