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  Ottawa Divorce .com Forums > Main Category > Domestic Violence

Domestic Violence Dealing with abuse and violence. Getting support and help.

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  #11 (permalink)  
Old 07-31-2012, 09:04 PM
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Originally Posted by Exquizique View Post
Another went to the police about his ex spouse selling an over half a million dollar matrimonial property without his knowledge and consent by misrepresenting her marital status and other information (which equates to fraud, and definitely over $5,000 in this case i would think) - the police shrugged and told him to go to family court and have it all sorted out there.
Thank you for this post - i am limited in what I can say now (request of my lawyer) for what has yet been submitted? (sorry I do not know the term but regardless I admit that this is getting over my head and my head - things just go in circles.....) But these issues are very real for me and from my perspective:

I am thankfull every day that my kids are older, as put here, there is no question of visitation or anything else truely noble that the courts could exact punishment with, even so my ex has on top of the difficulties my actions and my illness' have had on the family, specifically the kids, in spite of the doctors, how they say I handled myself so well under the circumstance, now that I am away from her.......

PAS and Parental Alienation - yup I had no clue what - I do now and people can't believe. Her BS arrest for Christmas the best thing that could have happened to me (although I barely am holding on living in a motel room....) The lies, purgery - She has been doing this for so long to keep her secrets I sincerely believe she really thinks it is all true and with her full denial......

I have been really down these last months, really down - even with the bank's help which will be so important (they are going to actually provide all the records to show she indeed took care of all our banking and that she made all the transactions, she depleated all the accounts), doesn't help me today as I - struggle to survive. But will she ever have to pay for her lies, the crap she has pulled, even my arrest - my criminal "legal team" which is the Queens University Law legal aid program, that I too am thankful, was approached by the crown last week to set up the paperwork to have her BS charges dropped completely, this time with no peace bond (that I turned down a few months ago).

She continues to lie and deny every single thing 100% - how much will the legal fees end up being to get back what she took/stole - the easy items to prove (decided to drop many things to keep my costs down but today it stands at over $250,000 - I don't have a choice but go to court - I don't think the court will make her pay for my legal fees, the costs to provide the courts the proof that her lies are just that.

To me, a bigger cost, the kids, well she took every advantage she could from my medical issues to slowly change their perceptions..... I know they need to believe something, and the kids, easier to believe her lies than face the truth that Dad actually is not the villan here. Leave the kids out of it - I have tried so hard, I accept what the kids think - they do not have the truth..... I wait. It is killing me today but I wait.

The case conference? Her lies were so thick even the judge - my ex has actually dragged the kids into our divorce!!!! Ex forced the Judge to make an order for them to come forward and produce full financial disclosure from the first day they went to College - Savings, our RESPs, their employers-past and present, current income to thier future employment projections....... The Judge ordered everything! My lawyer said that even he was surprized to hear the judge - her lies are so thick even the judge, the judge didn't have any choice but have the kids make disclosure.

But it is ok that she has wrecked havoc with any chance today to even begin the rebuilding process with HER children..... her BS charges, she is happy though, today she has HER house free and clear..... she has everthing she wants today and I cashout $1,100 a month from what is left of my rrsp..... how long will that last? And then there is a slap on the wrist......maybe?
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Old 07-31-2012, 09:21 PM
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Alleged child abductor now in Winnipeg | Winnipeg | News | Winnipeg Sun

A truly horrible example of parental abduction ,that is now getting to the prosecution stage.Hard to see how the parent in question can call this "in the child's best interests"
Thanks murphyslaw. I'd wondered about this case and recently posted. Thanks for update.

Hope these guys get more than a slap on the wrist.

If you see more please post and update.
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Old 07-31-2012, 09:51 PM
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Originally Posted by Gladtobesingleagain View Post
Thanks murphyslaw. I'd wondered about this case and recently posted. Thanks for update.

Hope these guys get more than a slap on the wrist.

If you see more please post and update.
http://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/f...8-found-12177/
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Old 07-31-2012, 10:27 PM
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Thanks for posting this, Tayken.

An interesting read - and although I see you've highlighted certain quotes, after reading the entire case, this one jumped out at me:

Quote:
[110] But a person entitled to custody of a child must demonstrate more than an ability to care for a child. A person entitled to custody must demonstrate insight into the needs of a child which are separate from his or her own needs, and must be able to meet those needs even when - and especially when - the child’s needs are different from those of the parent.
and this one:
Quote:
[127] The court was particularly struck by his insight into the effect on Cecilia of travelling two hours each way and transitioning between her parents’ homes. He suggested that the driving be shared –although he was prepared to continue all the driving – to minimize Cecilia’s distress when leaving a parent. By each parent picking up for the next period with him or her, it was the other parent being ‘left behind” not the child. To paraphrase his submission, the parent can take the distress of being left behind; the child should not have to.
Any reasonable person would/should understand that both parents being involved in the growth of their child, is an integral part of taking care of their child's needs.

Last edited by mcdreamy; 07-31-2012 at 10:42 PM. Reason: eta; added another quote
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Old 08-01-2012, 08:14 AM
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Originally Posted by mcdreamy View Post
Thanks for posting this, Tayken.

An interesting read - and although I see you've highlighted certain quotes, after reading the entire case, this one jumped out at me:

Any reasonable person would/should understand that both parents being involved in the growth of their child, is an integral part of taking care of their child's needs.
Both excellent quotes. I didn't want to re-post the entire case and just cherry picked the topics. The challenge for this judge in the matter is the "unreasonable" conduct of one of the parents.

The whole "past conduct" review done by the judge is excellent. How the judge relates the mother's conduct to the impact to the child and other parent is very well thought out. Another thread may be useful in exploring the analysis in detail.

Last edited by Tayken; 08-01-2012 at 08:42 AM.
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