question on rights to an item

[sunnydc]

I'll try to put the points in as clearly as possible:

- after 3.5 years was left without any notice for a married woman
- had to find a new place to live and was homeless for about a month, because he moved ASAP back in with his parents, rent free, with the new woman (had to move back to my home province to live with my brother for over a month)
- was told at the time that I could have the laptop that he was paying for, since I used it all the time anyways, and he had 3 other computers, and I had none.
- during the relationship I paid all of the rent for almost 2 years, and paid 3/4 of the rent for the rest of the duration, so that he could pay his student loans.
- 6 months later he's DEMANDING that I give him the laptop back, or pay the payment for it, which I can't afford, due to still owing damage deposit, and connection fees for my new apartment, plus trying to get caught up on the bills that I was behind on because of the financial burden from before because I was paying most of the bills.

So I'm wondering, I'm not greedy or anything, I haven't got any sort of computer at home to use for my job if I just give it back to him. He just built himself a brand new $3000 computer like 3 weeks before he left me (not sure if that matters or not..) and has several others.

I just want to brace myself for what to expect, because I've gotten nothing from this whole situation but pain and heartache, and I've been nothing but nice to him about everything (I gave him EVERYTHING he's ever had that might have gotten packed up in the chaos of moving, since it was my responsibility to pack up the apartment we had previously)

Anyways that's the long and short of it, any suggestions, or any further details that might be needed? Thanks in advance for any sort of advice. I just want this over with, its 6 months after the fact and just when I try to move on, this comes out of the woodwork.

[KanataKathy]

Is he still making payments on the laptop? Does he have a receipt to show that he is the owner of the laptop ie (who is the legal owner)?

I would suggest that if he is the owner of the laptop but is willing to transfer ownership to you, with you making the remainder of the payments on the laptop.

It sucks that you paid most of the rent during the relationship, but the legal costs of trying to recover his share might be greater than the costs you might be able to recover...

[dadtotheend]

Tell him to get bent.

Latops are cheap these days - cheaper than trying to recover it by taking you to court.

Ignore him.

[sunnydc]

Yeah I don't even want to DO anything legally to be honest. Since he was the one that made all the moves and stuck me with the extra expenses I was hoping that he'd just let it go at him giving it to me, but I guess not. I think I actually have the receipt because I have the originally packaging of the laptop.

Transferring ownership was something I thought about.. but I can't afford to pay him, so that means I wouldn't be able to pay it on my own either... unless I get a second job.. which is possible, I should probably look into that as well I suppose so I can get this over with.

[sunnydc]

Originally Posted by dadtotheend

Tell him to get bent.

Latops are cheap these days - cheaper than trying to recover it by taking you to court.

Ignore him.

That's kind of my stance on the whole situation. He's not responsible for rent or living expenses currently, and he makes GREAT money, so its cheaper for him to get a new one, whereas I don't have the means to get a new one. If I had something else I'd give it back in a heartbeat just to be rid of the drama.

[rustedinnocence]

You said after 3.5 years, he up and left...
Did you live together for that period? If you did, and you say he makes GREAT money, maybe you need to let him know that his giving you the laptop and continuing to make the payments is a whole heck of a lot cheaper than paying spousal support... because after three years, you could be entitled... especially if his leaving the way he did left you in financial trouble...
.....letting you keep the laptop would be a very wise choice for him...and heck, it's his credit, it's his bill, he'll keep paying for it. Just don't give it back. I doubt he'll want to involve lawyers if he knows he could end up having to pay spousal support.

[sunnydc]

Oh yes we lived together for at least 3 years of the 3 and a half year relationship. I've been very good, I've never said any harsh words or anything and tried to be reasonable with everything, but your right, after looking it up, I could definitely hit him up for support so I think it'd be in his best interest to just let me keep the computer. I don't even want to talk to him, haven't spoken to him for months and had all emails etc blocked (apparently for good reason) since I was just trying to move on with things and not cause any trouble. I wouldn't even kick up a stink over this, except that I use it for working from home on days where I don't feel well, or need to do some overtime.