I understand your situation very well. I think that if it is worth it to you then you should just move forward, stop the back and forth between the lawyers and have your lawyer schedule a Case Conference. Serve your STBX and let him see that you are through with his bullying and would like answers and resolutions, as you are obviously not going to get them through any negotiation directly with him.
Don't spend one more minute worrying about his nasty emails, let him send them, let him threaten, let him rant, let him rave.... then giggle and file.
Honestly, you can't stop him from doing anything, you can only keep yourself sane by chosing to react (or not) in a way that makes you able to look yourself in the mirror in the morning.
Oh, and welcome
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