Hi Jenny,
No, unfortunately, I paid my student loan off around 12 years ago. I have totally worked hard and finally made it to do what I have wanted to do for a very long time. As for the house, he will not move out, will not let me move out (because he has told me if I do, he expects me to continue paying the mortgage...and if he doesn't, my credit rating is shot). He also is unwilling to list it, so, as I explained to Honey I'm Home, he has been holding me and my daughter hostage.
I just can't give in to him. If I end up paying him the thousand a month he is demanding, it will mean his take-home pay will be far greater then mine and I will have our daughter (17 this month).
I would love nothing more then to just move her and I out and leave him hanging. One of the letters I received from his lawyer back in October stated that he will waive spousal support if I sign over the house to him, and basically move out with my daughter to the street (with no downpayment for another home). What I can not figure out...is how he can state that he is so "needy" and desperate for my money for support in one letter, but the next tell me he can take over the whole house and all it's costs himself??? Does that not make him look like a total fool?
I know people have told me it doesn't matter what he is spending his money on, but my lawyer told me I am not responsible for his addictions...how can it be fair that I would have to work to pay him to sit in a bingo hall and waste money? I intend to argue that, along with the facts that he never did anything compensatable; i.e. he never stayed home to raise our children (we also have a son, 23), he earned more then I did throughout the majority of the relationship and he will not be economically deprived...I am sure on the $34,000 he earns he can support himself. It is not like he is earning minimum wage part time someplace. I have also told him I do not want anything from him, like child support, and that he can have everything in this house. I would really like to stay here with my daughter, because we both love it here and it is close for her to school, her friends and both her co-op job and regular part-time job, all which are walking distance. We end up moving and it will mean rides for her back and forth and I am a twelve-hour shift worker who can not always provide that. As well, her father, being the useless slug he is, will never provide her with rides, because he works straight nights.
Anyways, if anyone out there has any ideas, whatsoever, I'm all ears...thank you all for your advice.
Customgal
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