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Old 10-29-2009, 01:29 AM
rizwandar1 rizwandar1 is offline
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Red face Some suggestions

I would recommend the following:

1. Definitely find a lawyer who can help you with this.
2. Most importantly you want to see your child - especially if she is denying you access - claiming that you have been abusive to the spouse / child. But she would definitely need to prove this at the court.

3. Never try to go down inside the house or place where she is living. This will give your ex- the ground to call the police for any reason.

4. Try to keep an account of each and every encounter you have with her - including phone conversations - what was said in the conversations. Even if you have emails etc of her.

5. Try always to talk reason - and make sure that you have can prove that you have tried to talk through reason with your ex. The judge would eventually like to see how you were trying to communicate and resolve the issues and how your spouse/ex was trying to communicate back.

6. Why i would suggest a lawyer? So that he can get you access to your child right away. If your ex is claiming that you have been abusive to the child, she would have to prove that - by police or medical reports. In case of no such claims or proof, she cannot keep your child away from you.

7. In the first case conference, you do not have to say anything if you have the lawyer. Just let the lawyer know that:

a. you want interim access to the child. Make sure that you can provide a long list of details of how you have been involved with the development of your child prior to being thrown out. For example, taking the child for swimming, school, how you have been involved with the child's homework, taking the children out for shopping, groceries, etc.

b. In the first case conference, ideally try to set a spousal support and child support. It would be good for the long run. Ofcourse the SS amount depends on how much you earn and how much she earns. Child Support is independent of what your ex earns but depends on what you earn.

c. Take one day at a time. The most important thing for you is to have access to your child. Money comes and goes and eventually the court would be able to decide that - but i think a child's life kind of depend on how the two parents cope with the situation.

Hope this helps.

Any specific questions.. write to me to