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Old 09-08-2017, 08:55 AM
len14 len14 is offline
Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 41
len14 is on a distinguished road

I'm sorry it came across as judgemental. I was actually feeling sad for your family because your situation is highly emotionally charged and it will only have negative ramifications.

In most marriages where the relationships continue past the expiry date, typically infidelity occurs and a lot of other crappy things. You say the marriage wasn't loving, I think that you both are responsible for fixing or moving on - not continuing with the banalities of life and then being devastated when the inevitable occurs. Marriage breakdowns are not one sided unless your partner is a narcissist.

Perhaps in his mind he truly sees the separation as having started earlier. If there's that much $ at stake then a forensic accountant will get to the bottom of it - there's paper/electronic trails to everything thankfully! Furthermore if he's simply contesting separation date, that doesn't indicate that he's hiding assets, more likely he doesn't want to share appreciation of property he purchased since his version of the separation date - many here wouldn't fault him for that! You make no mention on whether he has declared the down payment of his new home.

From a human perspective and from a woman's perspective my heart breaks for what your feeling. Falling apart when there were signs of a break down in marriage is quite dramatic- you have to be the strong mother your children deserve.

Accusing the father of your 5 children of defrauding you and being a cheater will only hurt them and will prevent healing.

If I were in your shoes there wouldn't be any amount of money that would force me into litigation and put my fate into the hands of a judge and pay copious amounts of hard earned money to the lawyers.

It's funny how one single act of kindness towards your stbx will turn this around and mediate instead - trust that this is achievable even in highly contentious situations. Even more importantly it will protect your kids from the high conflict.

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