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Old 08-04-2017, 10:08 AM
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LovingFather32 LovingFather32 is offline
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Therefore, there is no reason to believe that the kids will be taken to their commitments if they are with him.
His choice .. his parenting time. Perhaps not the best choice. But you can't halt access because of it.

In this situation, I have asked clearly for a guaranteed return date only (5 times now). I have always provided one to him and he will not do so, only give a pick up time. I am just asking for equal treatment.
He's also asking for equal treatment. You're refusing it. Write the letter I suggested..but I surely wouldn't block access.

No abuse although I have laid out clear and relevant parenting issues (not to be spoken of here) and he won't address them.
No abuse or history of any kind of harm to you or the kids? That's what I figured.

You are in no position to effectively assess his parenting abilities. Warring ex's tend to amplify negative qualities and minimize good ones of each other in a very subjective manner.

If he were willing to sit down and talk in mediation or even just send a letter that has clear requests I would be more than happy to do so, but he just makes demands without room for negotiation.
Are you telling him that "you're willing" to negotiate his 50/50 request? Or is it "Come to mediation but dont even think about having an equal relationship with your kids"? If so .. I wouldn't either.

I said ok but I could only agree to do so if we can sit down and talk as there are reasons we split and took off.
Wait, so you're okay with 50/50 .. as long as he discusses why he left you? Oh no .. try to keep your relationship with him separate from his relationship with his kids.

He is prone to anger, called me the C word in front of the kids and frequently spent his income before contributing the household.
Are you a church mouse that sits quietly during arguments? Just curious. Not nice of him for sure, but not a significant enough reason to refuse 50/50 or block any kind of access.

We separated to protect the kids. I owe it to them to provide security going forward.
So his parents and he can provide security for the kids every other weekend, midweek... and long weeks that you leave them there while you work ... but not on a 50/50 basis? I'm just trying to understand. BTW .. in my opinion what you owe your kids is an opportunity to enjoy an equal relationship with 2 loving parents. He sounds like he's good to them .. just not so good at navigating all the intricacies of separation and communication with you. That can be resolved with time .. but time the kids spend with him cant be replaced.

Last edited by LovingFather32; 08-04-2017 at 10:19 AM.
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