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Old 05-06-2017, 05:22 PM
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Originally Posted by trinton View Post
there are very pleasant single moms out there but there is always the ones that badmouths and aleinates dad and screws around with his access and just uses him for money.
My current partner, is the perfect example of one who has tried to be very flexible with allowing the biological father access to the three children living with us, in all 13 years and counting. He was quite regular with having them every other weekend, on the alternating weekends that I had my son with me in the beginning. So, it would be one weekend with mine and hers, and then a weekend without any kids, if you get the picture. The difference? I have ALWAYS paid my child support regularly, and religiously every month. My partner's ex? He has been very sporadic about contributing anything financially. He has been on and off employed. Changed residences more times than we can count. Yet, there has never been any court battles between them.

Originally Posted by trinton View Post
why do some single moms act in this way? what motivates them to do so? what makes them feel they own you and your life?
It's a power and control thing, plain and simple. It's the way the law works, unfortunately favouring women under the pretense of "in the best interests of the child(ren)". This is exactly why I chose not to pursue to have my access enforced, back when my son decided he was "uncomfortable" with coming over every other weekend. My ex-bitch even openly bragged to me once, "the law favours us women, so don't try anything". I chose to take the high road and not react to that statement. Simply by making that statement alone, tells you the kind of person she is. I know I am better than that. I won't let a piece of trash like her drag me down. And if you let yours drag you down, she is getting the better of you. Don't let it happen. Keep strong.

Originally Posted by trinton View Post
i personally think it's a power thing by controlling women. in my case. former spouse has asked our kid who the boss is at an exchange after obtaining sole custody.
Simply disregard such childish questions. A former co-worker once told me, "if there are ever any unpleasant words exchanged between your ex in the presence of your child, make sure those unpleasant words come only from her mouth". I have never forgotten that piece of excellent advice and stuck by it religiously, during any kind of interactions in the past and it has worked very well. Remember, YOU are the better person in the end.

Originally Posted by trinton View Post
I just dont understand.. are they just simple trashy people who hve the nerves to screw over other peoples lives in attempts to boost their self esteem? is it a personality disorder? do they hate you that much that they want your kids to also hate you? is it maybe a revenge thing? do they just simple enjoy having their former partner or spouse under their thumb? are they psychopaths ? what's wrong with these specific single moms?
And my ex-bitch falls under that exact category you describe, so I hear you LOUD AND CLEAR. She's been on EI since we parted ways (she got canned from a nice government job, due to a "serious" number of absences), and then on ODSP (for IBS). In answer to your question, yes it is a power and control thing. It is a sick pleasure about exacting revenge. It is about having too much time on their hands to put their focus on nothing better than to "take the easy way out" instead of getting a job and focusing on their own betterment and moving on. In my ex's case, she still harbours a bitterness toward me, which I have long stopped giving two tinker's damn about. I know she'll never admit it, but I think she's extremely jealous of the lifestyle I enjoy with my current partner and her three children (who know me better than my own son). It's an entitlement complex. She likely feels SHE should be living the lifestyle my current partner enjoys with me. However, there's a price to pay for all this enjoyment. Neither my current partner or I, are lazy people. We both work long hours to keep the bills paid, the roof over our head, food on the table for us and the three kids and our vehicle expenses paid. And the sickening part of all this? We don't enjoy that much of a better life than my ex-bitch, who seems to have nothing better to do in her life but try to create drama for our household. That will only last for long.....
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