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Old 01-03-2015, 10:11 PM
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Yeah, I looked at that too, in order to prove coercion and this is coming from Links17's comment about the legal technicality of changing a signed contract.

btw It was signed off by the judge.

To nullify a signed agreement. She has to prove undue influence came from the other party aka me.

1. I created the situation (I did not, I've been giving her early child support for the past few years to pay for her phone, hydro, etc)
2. I created the agreement (which I did not as she approached me)
3. I threatened or pressured her into giving her no choice (again, she is the one that offered to me, I did not say give me full custody and you will get your lump sum, she approached me.)

It's like saying, I go to you and ask you to give me money as I'm late on my rent. I say you can have my car for 5K even though it's worth 20K. We sign and have a commissioner of oath swear on it. Does that mean the next day I go to the court house and say I signed it under pressure and therefore should get the car back? What is the point of a contract then? Pressure is normal, undue influence isn't.

This example is it being objectified to argue on the point of legal technicality, which in this matter is completely different.

I did what I did because I wanted my son in a stable home environment. I was sick and tired of the BS.

There were 3 options,

1. Give her the bulk amount and call it advanced child support for the next 4 months which at the end of the day does nothing for my child's need to for a stable home environment as this is just enabling the situation as it always has been.
Outcome = son is in unstable environment

2. Ignore her and watch her get evicted along with my son with nowhere to go. In order for me to even get custody of him then, i would need to apply into court etc...special chambers aka January 2015. etc. And who knows where he would end up being, shelter etc. To be perfectly frank, this was not an option, it's your own flesh and blood. Enough said. I can't imagine any parent waiting it out to see your own son/daughter suffer.
Outcome = son is in unstable environment

3. Give her the money, and take her offer. She gets out of debt, is not evicted and your son is now guaranteed in a stable home environment.
Outcome = son is in stable environment.

So I made the decision based upon the circumstances. I'm a solution based person and I chose the outcome that best favored our son. So let me know if I'm wrong here.

Correct, that is what she is trying to offer me now, 50/50 going forward. As for the money as CS paid in advance, that's non-negotiable according to her. She says that money has already been paid off since I have NOT been giving her CS since Sept-Jan even though I have had him full custody of him since then.
That is what she put in her affidavit.

And I doubt any judge would agree the loan is advance CS or maybe I'm wrong. Doesn't make sense to me.

As for her schedule, sorry to clarify.
She works Monday to Thurday 2-8PM and Saturday/Sunday 12-5PM. Her actual day off is Friday.

He is in Montesorri fulltime but she she drops him off there at 2PM and I get him at 5:30PM after work. I don't agree with having to drop him off at 8:30PM at her place every other week. We do homework, dinner and bath and then he needs to be in bed by then. Shuffling him for her schedule is not in his best interest. Anyone disagree here?

That is the main point my lawyer is arguing on, that she can't physically do week on week off because you have him those times already when she is working since she started her job.

The main thing is I want to continue with primary residence with me for his schedule and stability.

What do you think my chances are of keeping it as it is and are my reasons valid?

As a funny aside, since life shouldn't be all serious. It was serious at the time but funny now. A week after it got signed by the judge and filed to law clerk. She calls me and tells me I used the wrong from, "change consent order" and not "consent order". Therefore, the old order stands and she has full custody. As well, she will be filing assault charges on me to lock in the full custody.

I came to the court house, asked if the old order stands, clerk says no, the order you have is valid, mentioned what happened, he laughed and said this isn't Law and Order, the judge signed it! and if you are worried, he took the original document, put in "change" in front of consent order, stamped it and said give it to her. And btw, you can serve her as well documents to file for child support! Course I never used them.

Needless to say, the assault charges were never filed. I think she is waiting for the upper hand and she will file them.
Originally Posted by Rioe View Post
As for her schedule, that sucks too but it is her problem. Try for a 2-2-5 schedule, that puts the child with her on her W-T days off. Maybe you can also slip a Right of First Refusal into the new agreement that puts your son with you while she's working on her weekend, instead of in a daycare.

Or, you could try to rely on a four month status quo of you having full custody and argue that it's not in the child's best interests to change it back.
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