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Old 10-11-2014, 02:16 AM
MommyTime MommyTime is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2014
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Here is the exchange [identities obscured in these brackets]:

X to me
Message:

What time Monday is convenient for you for me to pick up [children]?

ME
Message:

1) What time are the [children] generally picked up from daycare? By my understanding, it is usually around 6pm.

2) A third-party pick-up would be most suitable.

X to me
Message:

By this answer am I to conclude that you think you should have, in effect, the bulk of the holiday? This is not reasonable. I am happy to share the day but 6 is not reasonable.

I suggest noon as a reasonable compromise which will allow the [children] close to equal time with both of their families.

ME
Message:

1) The current order does not make any provision for holidays, nor has agreement been reached about a holiday schedule.

2) The initial question in this exchange was "what is convenient on Monday?" The response was in the form of another question to facilitate an appropriate exchange about plans that could possibly already be in place.

3) A reasonable compromise, as a "meeting at the middle" given this exchange, is Monday 3pm -- and most suitably by a third-party pickup.

X to me
Message:

My interest in this issue is ensuring the [children] have time with both of their families. It is my understanding that xx and yy are with you from noon on Sunday which is why I suggested noon on Monday. It is worth noting that this would still give more of the holiday to xx and yy

I am happy to split the difference and get the [children] at 1:30 which still is a far less than equal split of the holiday. Please have them ready at that time for pick up.

I will send you a text when we arrive.

ME
Message:

Communication shall remain through this medium until agreement can be reached otherwise, and by email for emergencies. [That is what has been recommended by various third parties].

A compromise has already been offered for 3pm, which allows "your family" an extended [holiday] dinner celebration on the official day (which by experience does not start until later).

There is no court order that has outlined any provision for such events, although a multitude of generous offers have been made to address this in the last 6 months.

The [children] will be in the lobby at 3pm on Monday shortly after we get back. Thanks.

X to me
Message
:
I would remind you that there is a Court Order that stipulates that I am the custodial parent. I have, in good faith, initiated this exchange so as to allow us to come to a reasonable and child focused resolution.

That said, I have no interest in squabbling over a few hours and as it appears you have plans I am happy to accommodate those.

ME
Message:

I suggested a reasonable compromise -- "the meeting at the middle" -- several posts ago given the current schedule, and as an extended response to your initial inquiry.

Other legal matters are best left out of e-conversation when appropriate representatives (that are available through various channels) are not present.

Kindly inform who the third party will be at Monday's 3pm exchange pick-up.

X to me
Message:

I will be picking up the [children].

ME
Message:

A third party would be more suitable given the incident on 04 September 2014..

X to me
Message:

On 4 September [with D4] there were no issues or concerns and the same situation will be true Monday. Should you feel the need to remain in the lobby that is your choice.

ME
Message:

I will likely be returning in company where a third party would be most suitable. Kindly consider the suggestion.

X to me
Message:

I have no idea what that meant. I will be there at 3.

ME
Message:

Once more, a third party would be most suitable. Being reasonably sensitive to this request would be best.

X to me
Message:

I will be picking up my children.

If there is something you wish to share prior to that then I invite you to do so.

I can see no reason for your request.

ME
Message:

Kindly consider the request.

X to me
Message:

Considered. Thank you. See you Monday.

ME
Message:

And the third party will be?

X to me
Message:

I will be picking up the [children] as I have said.

ME
Message:

You would, clearly, not be considered a third party as this is a reasonable request given recent history. There are more than [the children's] best interest[s] involved in this.

X to me
Message:

This exchange has gone in a circle.

I am confident we can execute an exchange as we have before.

There has never been an issue in the presence of our children and I have no reason to fear one. I will pick up our [children] and this is and should be the expected norm.

Thank you.

ME
Message:

1) There has only been one exchange between you and I that was tense and unnecessary verbiage was received. The children absorb this.

2) The last face-to-face was less than desired and hoped for.

3) A third-party exchange is most suitable given history, recent at that. Compliance here is key to a reasonable request in the children's best interests.

X to me
Message:

I will pick up our [children].

This is the normal we need to establish and their well being is served by seeing us do these exchanges in a civil way. I consider this exchange over.

ME
Message:

The well being of everyone is at stake, and little in recent history has provided such trustworthy assurance as those that have been suggested to me in this exchange.

Compromising the [children] -- or anyone else -- matters.

Kindly consider a third party for the pick-up on Monday at 3pm -- without police enforcement, security, or called-upon witnesses to be in place. How difficult need this be?

A third party will ensure the children do not absorb what would otherwise be unnecessary. Assurance a third-party will be in place would be graceful and appropriate.

X to me
Message:

This exchange has been unnecessary and is now over.

I will be there to pick up my children.

I will in all likelihood be accompanied.

Feel free to secure whatever support or witnesses you feel are needed.

ME
Message:

This could be easier than you project it will be.

X to me
Message:

It will be fine. A complete non-issue.

ME
Message:

One last time, a third-party would be best suited for everyone involved.
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