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Originally Posted by goingthruit
Hi LV.
I have a question for you about your custody arrangement. Does your child move back and forth between residences weekly, or do one of you have "primary" residence? And you get "access" often.
My current arrangement (until we sell the custodial home) is to have the kids in the home and my ex and I move in and out each week. I would like to maintain something like that after the home is sold and we both get our own places but can see that this would be difficult for the children, essentially they would not have a home.
Thank you
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Hi going,
that is a good question you have. Our child spends for the most part a split week schedule between the homes 4/3 days and 3/4 days and travels between the homes. We have a joint custodial regime in place for our child. Either parent can make decisions in regards to the child as we worked out the significant decisions such as school in advance. IE: if wither parent moves away from the school jurisdiction, regardless the child would still go to the same school. If both parent's moved away then we would cross that bridge when it occurred. We agreed to this arrangement as we wanted stability for our child. It is somewhat irrelevant now as our changed schools by default this year due to the grade advancement.
We are and were able to accommodate this regime with success as we live relatively close to one another. Communication is abundant.
As far as primary residence that is a good question also and would depend on the week that our child is spending more time. We look at it as our child has two homes.
Your plan is sometimes referred as "nesting" where the parent's move in and out. Once your matrimonial home is sold, you can still be successful if the children rotate each parent's home as long as both parent's co-operate, communicate and are on the same page. In my own situation, my sons mother and I communicate often so nothing falls through the cracks such as homework assignments etc.
Neither one of us are power struggling for control; it does not matter what parent brings our child to the Dr., Dentist, etc as long as our child gets there.
When my sons mother makes a decision on the fly , she keeps me informed and usually explains the ration behind same.
I guess I can only say that if you want a joint regime to work, both parents have to be child focused and put their differences aside. There are benefits to this arrangement as it is less stress for all.
lv